Archive-name: Samesex/majlea01.txt Archive-author: Archive-title: Playing in the Major Leagues - 1 WARNING: This story will contain descriptions of a variety of sexual acts between men and MINOR boys. Violence and inter-racial relation- ships occur thoughout. The story is NOT intended to be racist but is a 'realistic' portrayal of the life of a young Puerto Rican boy as he grows up and discovers that his 'preferred partners' are of his own sex. COPYRIGHT: Copyright is held by the author at an27868@anon.penet.fi. September, 1993. Fair use consists of copying and distributing via electronic means in the public domain only. In printed media, copyright protection remains for more than individual copies. FACT OR FICTION: The story is entirely fiction. It did not happen although there is some probability that a story like this has happened in the past. Any resemblance to individuals, alive or dead, is unfortunate! REPLIES,SUGGESTIONS,ETC: E-mail comments and criticisms to an27868@anon.penet.fi, or post to alt.sex.stories.d. I will generally respond to all sincere email. Your support and suggestions are both welcomed and appreciated. Please do not post here! Please feel free to comment or point me towards ftp sites for similar stories. SPECIAL THANKS: An anonymous reviewer has my special thanks. This individual had edited the work, suggested a wide of variety of changes and otherwise assisted in its production. Thank You! You know who you are. PLAYING IN THE MAJOR LEAGUES. Prologue This morning I awoke slowly, becoming gradually aware of the boy lying beside me, his arm draped casually over my chest, his leg over my legs, his face pressed against my shoulder, his cheek hot against my skin. His breath was moist against my skin as his chest moved rhythmically though barely visible unless I looked closely. He stirred, his body pressing closer, a slight tremble passing through him like a little quiver and then he settled down again, back to sleep, his body unmoving. For a long while I looked at the boy lovingly, his dark hair glistening in the early morning light as it filtered though the trees outside the window, steadily getting lighter as morning came. The boy's hair is the color of dark mahogany, not black, but a rich dark brown. His hair is long and slightly curly and it lay tousled on the white pillow and over my shoulder. It is soft like silk but it has a surprising amount of body in it. His eyes were closed, his eyelids almost translucent, his eyebrows long and thin, almost feminine. The boy's lips are pale and full and they are open slightly, revealing perfectly shaped white teeth. His skin is much darker than mine, a golden-bronze from head to toe, not even a shade lighter at his thighs and hips because for the last two months he has spent almost every afternoon in the nude. He tans beautifully but he has the advantage of his heritage. His rich dark tan comes from our two months together on Phaenon. I should explain that Phaenon is our 34 foot yacht. Built in Canada in 1990 and engineered to one of the highest standards in the world, the boat is something Rafael and I treasure for the wonderful times that we have shared aboard it. This summer we spent two and a half glorious months cruising down the Inter-coastal Waterway to Florida, and then across to the Bahamas and the other islands of the Caribbean. We returned only two days ago. I decided, as I looked at him, that he is incredibly beautiful and I gently brush the smooth satin skin with my hand. I have watched people's heads turn and look at him when we are out together. I have seen men and women stare at the beautiful boy and I sense that they are attracted, enamored of the boy with the lithe graceful body. I know they wonder whether I am his father or merely a friend. The boy feels deliciously warm and his body seems to glow with energy and life. His skin is perfectly smooth with the silky oiliness of a child, a dry warmth emanating from a lustrous brown body. I know that sooner or later I must write this all down. He is growing up, my first memories of the boy are less certain now, the details grow hazy every passing day. This morning, as I lay back in the pillows I decided to begin. The story that follows is based upon what I have discovered myself, from what Rafael has told me, and from what can be reasonably supposed about his life before I came to know him. The story is a long one, it's a story that is sad but one which needs to be told. Too many people don't understand, or don't want to understand. This morning I picked up a writing pad and began to write. This is the story of another way to live, of a boy who discovered that he could play in the major leagues. Most of the names of people, the clinic, and the institution where Rafael lived have been changed, though the protection I have given them is undeserved in all but one case. This wonderful young boy, now eleven years and four months old, came into my life at a time when I needed him, or someone like him. After my divorce and fourteen years of marriage I experienced an intense loneliness. Rafael has lived with me for the last thirteen months. They have been the happiest months of my life. For all but four nights of that time Rafael has slept in my bed. Those first four nights are something both of us will never forget. Every night the boy screamed, his nightmare returning until he finally awoke in terror. Each night his small body was drenched in sweat, covered with a wet film, his sheets damp. He cried for hours, sobbing onto my shoulder as I held him tightly. From the story he told me that first night, and the three nights that followed I pieced together most of what I know. On the fifth night I brought Rafael to my bedroom. For the first time Rafael slept through the night. He still wakes up in the middle of the night, sweating and shaking, sometimes crying, though such nightmares have become increasingly less frequent. The last one was more than two months ago. I think, I hope, that it was the last. In some ways Rafael is a very lucky boy, in others, not so lucky. The boy and I share a secret, a very special secret that we dare not share. The reader will understand that Rafael does more, much more than merely sleep in my bed. We live in my condominium on an island on the East Coast. There is a spectacular view of the marshes and the InterCoastal Waterway. Our boat is moored outside, less than twenty five feet from the terrace. There are two bedrooms. The bedroom that Rafael and I share is on the second floor, it opens via a cathedral ceiling to the living room below. There is a sunny but very private deck next to the bedroom and I had a jacuzzi installed there shortly after Rafael came to live with me. We often use it before we go to bed. The other bedroom is made up and to any visitor it is the room of a normal eleven-year-old boy. Rafael often plays in there when I am working in the study. As far as Rafael's friends know, I am his uncle. The boy has stirred again, he is close to waking up, but not yet. This time his fingers closed, pulling me towards him, his small brown thighs pressing into my hip. His dream has intensified and he whimpered slightly, his naked body tensing slightly and then relaxing as his breathing quickened. I felt the moist heat of his groin, the small rigid cock squeezing alive and strong between us. I kissed him gently on the forehead, smoothing his hair back as I kissed his cheek, hoping that the boy was dreaming of me, wanting desperately to wake him, to hold him tightly and whisper my love to him. Then the boy pulled away slightly, moaning quietly, his breathing quickened and then strained as his small buttocks clenched, tensing, then suddenly writhing in unconscious ecstasy. His body arched, his slender legs kicking back the sheet, then his buttocks pressed back again. I grinned, looking along the boy's slender, still immature body, the sheet now bunched at his knees and revealing most of his naked body and I see his aroused cock poking rudely out from his little mounded pubis. The tiny blue- purple veins were swollen in the boy's wedge-shaped cock. His penis, even when it is fully erect, is short, still a bit less than three inches long. The rounded delicate tip is hidden by the boy's foreskin. It is tight and it is drawn to a wrinkled little orifice. When retracted, I know that the head of his penis is like a tiny bell, its sensitivity enhanced by the protection of his foreskin. His balls are still very small for an eleven-year-old boy, his scrotum tightened up in a firm little knot beneath his cock. I sighed, feeling the sadness return, my desire momentarily overwhelmed. The boy was too perfect, too wonderful, too alive, to lose that part of his magnificent body, to never experience the feelings that come with maturity. The tiny testicles inside his little pouch are spongy, unnaturally soft for a young boy. Although the extent of the damage that was done is still unclear, in a few years we will know more. Perhaps he was not injured as badly as the doctor suspected. I sighed again, lying back in the pillows, confused, sad and angry, wanting the boy more than I could stand, but somehow resisting the urge to wake him. +++++ "Hi!", he whispers sleepily as he presses forward against me again. I grin as I look back at him and put my note-pad down beside the bed. "Hi beautiful," I smile, "You were having a real dirty dream again." I tease. Rafael smirks and glances downward, along his slender body, seeing his little penis sticking out straight and parallel to his lower belly, "Huh huh! I guess he is pretty stiff, huh?", he acknowledges. and then adds with a sleepy smile, "So why didn't you wake me up?" I shrug. "I like watching you. So what happened? It looked like you were really enjoying it", I tease again. The boy giggles, somewhere between innocence and obscenity, then changing to the later he whispers, "Let's fuck, okay? I'll tell you later." I smile at the boy's vulgar desire expressed so shamelessly, so openly. He is only eleven and he is physically immature but he is also easily and often aroused. His crude and uninhibited lust seems playfully innocent. It is still a game to him. He sits up grinning cheekily, ready and eager to play. "Come on," he teases, as he reaches his small warm hand down and grasps my penis tightly, "Lemme get him real hard first, okay?" But although he is playful, Rafael is anything but innocent. Others before me have seen to that. I know very little about the boy before he was ten years old. What Rafael remembers he prefers to try to forget. From what he has told me I know that his first sexual experience occurred before he was eight years old. There have been many more in the three years that followed. From his file at Centerville Planation, the home for boys where he has spent five years of his life, I learned the following. Rafael was the child of a Puerto Rican woman and a father that he never knew. His father may have been American, there is no record of the father on his birth certificate and Rafael does not remember him. From his coloring and physical appearance I think the man was white, because Rafael's complexion, while dark, is not as dark as most Puerto Ricans. At the age of four the boy was abandoned at a state-run day care center. His mother left him there while she was looking for a job, at least that was her story at the time. She did not return in the afternoon and in the years that followed, never came back to get him. Rafael has never heard what happened to her. I suspect that she died from a drug overdose but I really don't know. Rafael's birth record indicates her age to be sixteen, she would have been twenty when she disappeared. There was no attempt to locate her, beyond checking police reports, and she has never tried to communicate with her son. Young Rafael was immediately placed with foster parents for about a year. For some reason unknown to me he was returned to the care of the State of Florida. For a period of more than three years Rafael lived in Centerville, a boy's home in the Miami area. The only photograph I have of Rafael during those years shows him with three other boys. He is skinny with a shy smile, somewhere between six and seven years old. His dark hair is closely cropped, 'Marine Style', but there is the unmistakable beauty, the delicately sculptured features, the small ears and nose, the big eyes that reflect an innate intelligence. Even as a little boy Rafael was beautiful. His skinny little body is perfectly proportioned, his dark-hued skin unblemished, his fine soft features have not changed in five years beyond becoming even more beautiful. But what is startling about the photograph is the boy's intensity as he looks towards the camera and radiates an intensity that is unexpected in a young child. He is dressed in shorts and a white tee shirt. He is innocent, a perfect child in every way. A few months before his eighth birthday he was again placed in a foster home. At that time Rafael was a very lonely boy, starved for affection and desperate for love. There was little love available for the boy in Centerville and when love and affection were proffered to him it came in the form of the 'foster' father taking Rafael by the hand and leading the boy into his bedroom. Whether Rafael went willingly I don't know but I suspect that he did. The 'foster' father convinced the boy to remove his jeans and underpants and then proceeded to masturbate him. The next time occurred within only a few days. Again the man brought the boy to his bedroom, this time sucking on the little boy's penis as well as masturbating him. It was the only love and affection that Rafael had known in almost eight years. He responded positively, enjoying the gentle touches that made his young body feel good. The next time occurred quickly, again within a few days. By now the man had grown increasingly confident. He undressed the boy and then proceeded to remove his own clothes. What happened then is unclear but I suspect that the boy was initiated into physical contact as a willing participant, though one whose emotional needs at the time were overwhelming. All I know is that Rafael told me that she (the 'foster' mother) surprised the two of them naked on the bed. She was terribly angry, slapped and screamed very loudly at the boy, calling him a 'whore' and a 'filthy little bastard'. Rafael still remembers crying most of the night, his little face still burning from her attack. The next day Rafael was returned to Centerville Plantation. His file was marked N.A. and dated February 12, 1990,in the upper right hand corner of the front cover. I have since discovered that this marking is intended to identify children that are not available for adoption, although the more I think about it the more I am convinced that there is an alternative meaning, one that is far more devastating than one could imagine. Rafael has talked about the events that occurred during the years that followed while he lived at Centerville. At first they were painful memories that evoked tears and some anger from the boy and myself but we have gradually come to realize that it is the events of that period of time that brought the two of us together. For that I am thankful. ++++ Rafael sits up again, he grins cheekily, his small hand half- enclosing my erect cock. He smirks, still very playful, his sexual desire increasing every second. "I love him", he teases gently, "I love him bunches and bunches. I want you to put him up me." I smile, still lying back on the bed as the naked brown- skinned boy straddles me. "He's still not that hard", I laugh, lovingly tousling his dark soft hair. The boy giggles and shrugs, squeezing his hand at the base of my cock and making it painfully hard as he compresses the shaft. "Yes he is, he's plenty hard enough," he says. I give the boy a resigned look and breathe out with a long sigh, feigning boredom. The boy smirks, "Yeah! Yeah! I know! Okay, first we play around, then you fuck me." Rafael squats over me, his little bronzed buttocks facing toward me, above my chest. He faces toward my legs. For a few delightful moments he caresses my cock, lightly with just the silky touch of his finger tips, then more vigorously, his small strong fingers expertly massaging, teasing it erect. I have already been hard for what seems most of the morning, my cock aching as I watched Rafael sleep, then dream. Now, his little fingers rub away the dry streaks of his mucus, a thin crusty film that was evidence of what we'd done the night before. Then he leans forward and opens his mouth, keeping his pale lips apart as he lowers himself forward, embracing the head of my cock with his pink soft tongue. I feel the soft wet point probing into the narrow slit of my cock, trying to force its way inside, then floating around and around the head, sinking down slightly so that my cock goes between his lips, then pulling away and feeling my cock with his tongue again. The boy's tongue is like velvet, soft, yet firm, wet and hot, and like Rafael, very alive. I sense him inhaling the sweet musky odor of his own body as his fingers begin to fondle my balls, still playful in their firm squeezes and gentle tugs. I reach forward, my hands parting the boy's small firm cheeks wide open to reveal his crack, the crevice marked by an almost invisible line that runs from the back of his tiny ball-sac, along the center-line of his body, finally disappearing as it reaches his spine. His opening is still loose as it always is in the mornings, still slightly dilated. There is no longer a dark ring around it. The dark purple of bruises disappeared many months ago, what remains is the pinkish brown flesh of his anus, opening into him without the lips that normally would be present at the anal-verge an eleven-year-old boy. Just inside his anus the flesh glistens, still moist from the KY, from the juices that we mingled deep inside him the night before, his own rectal mucus and my semen mixed together. There is a primal smell, a sweet raw odor that comes from the forbidden love of a man and boy. In the year we've spent together I have come to savor that wonderful taste of our union. the succulent juices that remained after my cock had finally pulled free of the exhausted boy. Now my tongue presses forward, caressing the length of his deep crevice, seeking the hot private enclosure inside him as I taste him. The looseness of his opening draws my tongue in, absorbing me into his hot wet softness, his buttocks pressing back instinctively, eagerly demanding more as my tongue penetrated deeper, pushing easily past the ring of his anus. At the same time the young boy's mouth slides downwards slowly taking more of my cock, his lips making a similar band around my cock. His odor overwhelms me, the intimacy making us both tremble with delight as our bodies start to move in unison, my cock now embedded several inches into his mouth, my tongue inside his rectum as far as I can go. Finally I can stand it no longer and my hand slips down between us, reaching up between his legs, I grasp his little balls tightly. His scrotum is loose and delicate and feels like the softest, smoothest thing imaginable. Rafael winces as I increase the pressure gradually, using my hand that enclose his balls to guide the movements of the rest of his body, tugging back gently so that he squirms his hips as he pushes back into my face, then pulling forward so that he takes more of my cock into his mouth. After just a few minutes he begins to tremble, shuddering involuntarily every couple of seconds, then, when he can no longer stand the painful pleasure he tries to pull away, even as droplets of pale yellow urine dribble from the puckered end of his cock onto my chest. By now the boy's balls have tightened in a small wrinkled lump and his cock has softened, relaxing, shrivelling as the boy's maleness submits to the urgent hunger that is growing ever stronger inside his trembling young body. When he stops moving my own orgasm is just seconds away. For a second or two I think about maintaining the rhythm but Rafael had other ideas. "Do it with your cock now," Rafael pleads anxiously, his high pitched voice demanding and urgent. I grin as I playfully roll the naked, very excited eleven- year-old boy off me and onto his side. I reach for the KY on the night-stand, the top still off from the night before. Rafael looks back over his shoulder, watching, his eyes shining with anticipation, with intense desire, as I lubricate the length of my cock, but especially the flared head where it will be needed the most. Then I position myself behind the boy as he draws his slender tanned legs upward to his chest. My cock glistens with the clear jelly, incredibly hard as it throbs, now very hungry for the beautiful naked boy before me. What we share is somewhere between love and lust. Chapter 1. Discovery: Rafael and Grant For a year after his return to Centerville, Rafael lived in Davis House. Davis House is a converted plantation mansion and accommodates boys under nine years of age. A few days after his ninth birthday he moved to Baker House and was placed in a twin room with a boy who was quickly to become his best friend. Baker House was a newer building and it accommodated up to thirty boys between the ages of nine and thirteen. It was named after the 'patron' of the boys' home. Alan E. Baker was a local businessman, lawyer, and judge, who at the age of 56 was (and still is) President of the Board of Directors of Centerville Plantation. Grant, another nine-year-old boy had been recently orphaned when both of his parents and his little sister had died in a car wreck. He had been placed in Baker House immediately upon his arrival. Grant was a good-looking boy, and like Rafael of above- average intelligence. But Grant paled by comparison beside the young Puerto Rican boy. By his ninth birthday Rafael had began to blossom into the beautiful and quick-witted boy that he is today. The closely cropped 'marine-style' haircut that he had only a year earlier was replaced by a full and thick head of curling dark-brown hair . He slowly lost the little-boy skinniness as his body grew lean and lithe. Both boys were terribly lonely; Grant was devastated by the loss of his family; Rafael, by the fact that he had never been loved. The friendship between the two boys began on the first day that Rafael was in Baker House. It was suddenly and painfully terminated when Grant was adopted by friends of his parents. That period of twelve months was critical to Rafael because he finally came to experience love and to discover that his preferred partners were of his own sex. Grant, who was several months older and quite a bit larger, took it upon himself to mentor the younger boy. Although his dominant role was usually something of a joke between the two boys, even then it reflected Rafael's preference to be the passive partner. It wasn't that Rafael was weaker or less intelligent, rather that he was easily led into things that he wanted to do. Thus, it was Grant that initiated the boys' first sexual experiences. That first discovery of their burgeoning sexuality occurred just a few nights after Rafael had arrived at Baker House. +++++ It had taken more time than usual for Rafael to complete his homework. His thoughts drifted aimlessly, constantly doodling in the back of his note-book, drawing pictures of the dog that he had always wanted. He drew pictures of a Golden Retriever. He harbored a dream that one day he would be adopted and his 'parents' would buy him a little puppy. He would play and play with the dog until it was late in the evening and he had to go to bed. Rafael drew in pencil, making fine lines for the long golden hair of the dog and easily capturing the sad dark eyes. The eyes were always strangely mysterious, almost sensuous like his own dark liquid eyes. He looked up suddenly as Grant flopped down on his bed. "Aren't you done yet?" Grant asked. Rafael shrugged, still sketching, his hand moving quickly as he shaded the dog's ear. "Kinda,... I can't do the sums properly,... I'm tired anyway," he added. Grant grinned, "He's good. I wish I could draw like you, Raf," and then added, "that's really beautiful you know." Rafael pushed the notebook away and looked at the other boy, "You done your teeth yet?" he asked. Grant shook his head. "Last one in the bathroom 's got bad breath," the smaller boy yelled and darted to the door, his head down as he barreled past his friend. He ran quickly and dodged past two older black boys in the corridor. He heard them yell something 'foul' behind him, then even louder as Grant came past in pursuit. Rafael pivoted around the bathroom doorway and ducked back out of sight. A second later Grant charged in and braked to a stop. For a second he looked for his best friend, then he screeched as Rafael grabbed him around the waist. They wrestled playfully, locking arms around each other's bodies as each tried to lift the other boy up. That was something that Rafael could not do, but which Grant found relatively easy. They giggled hysterically, then quieted quickly as the house master, Mr. Edwards, yelled out, "Lights out in five minutes, in bed now!" Hurriedly the two boys brushed their teeth then scampered back to their bedroom. They undressed quickly though only down to their underpants. They tossed their clothes onto the floor like any boy does and pulled their pajamas on just moments before the lights went out in the dormitory. They had been friends for four days and neither boy had seen the other naked largely because they had yet to shower at the same time and the opportunity had never presented itself in the privacy of their bedroom. The bedroom was dark. The only light entered through the window since the door was closed. As Rafael slid under the cool sheets and lay back on his pillow he heard Grant yawn sleepily. "Goodnight Raf," the other boy said. "'night Grant," Rafael replied as he settled down.He wasn't sleepy that night and his eyes were only half closed. He lay awake, his mind still on his imaginary dog and on the parents that would adopt him and take him away to a real home. He sighed quietly. He'd been at Centerville for five years and he had yet to be adopted. He was already at the age where it was nearly impossible. Most of the boys, almost always the white boys, were adopted within the first year or two. Inside, Rafael knew that it was just a matter of time before his best friend was adopted. It made him sad, ashamed of his brown skin, his soft dark hair and nearly black eyes. He wanted to be blond and blue-eyed like Grant. As he lay awake he heard noises in the dorm. Every night there were noises after lights out. He knew what happened as boys changed beds, sharing the night, their fears, and testing their emerging desires until late at night. Once lights were out, Mr. Edwards never came around again until it was time to get up. He could hear the creaking of a bed in the next room, a steady tapping of the frame against the bed. Sex was still a mystery to the nine-year- old boy, something that frightened him because it happened in the dark and he didn't understand what it was all about. Instinctively Rafael placed his thumb in his mouth and began to suck gently. "Hey! You still awake over there?" Grant whispered. Guiltily Rafael took his thumb away. "Uh huh... I can't go to sleep," Rafael said. "Me neither. Those guys next door are making a racket." "Yeah! I know," Rafael answered. There was a long silence, broken only by the squeaking noise coming through the partition wall between the two bedrooms. "You think it's Sam and Leroy?" "I guess, I think it's next door." Grant said quietly, sitting up slightly and supporting his head on his arm. "Raf,... did you ever do that stuff? In Davis?" "Uh? Oh,... I didn't but lots of kids did. Even the little kids sometimes. I think it happens more here though." Rafael turned onto his back trying to shut out the sound coming from the next room. It seemed to be getting louder, and faster. "What do you think they're doing?" he asked. Grant giggled, "Havin' sex of course. That's what they all do after the lights are out." Rafael smiled, curiously fascinated by the idea of 'sex', though he had no understanding other than a faint memory from when he was younger, a lot younger. A memory of a man whose face he could not remember. The man had touched his body and made his 'pee-pee' feel extra nice. In fact, the man had touched him all over after he had taken off the boy's clothes. Rafael couldn't remember who the man was. All he could remember was the man's hair, thick dark hair that spread over the man's chest and belly. He swallowed, putting his arms back behind his head, stretching his narrow chest. The buttons on his pajama top were undone and the cloth fell away to either side of his chest. With his eyes now accustomed to the dim light he could see the ripples in his skin made by the indentations of his ribs. The white sheet covered his belly from his navel down. Against the white of the sheet, the young boy was nearly black. He glanced across the room and was just able to make out his friend's curled-up body. Grant's buttocks faced toward Rafael's bed. The sheet seemed to be shivering with little jerking motions that made the cotton quiver. "Grant?" he asked curiously. "Yeah?" "Nothin'," Rafael sighed. The quivering stopped and Grant twisted onto his other side so that he faced toward Rafael. "Raf,... You promise you won't get mad if I ask you something?" "Uh,... I guess not. What's up doc?" Rafael whispered. "You know what they're doin' in there,... next door?" "Kinda," Rafael answered. "You,... wanna,... do,... that?" Grant asked slowly. The younger boy breathed out. The same question had been forming in his own mind but he hadn't been able to bring it out. He nodded, then realizing that his best friend probably couldn't see him in the dark, "Yeah, if you want to." The two boys lay still. Each afraid to take the next step. One of them would have to cross the floor, one of them would have to find the excuse or make the offer. "You wanna get in my bed? There's more light here near the window," Grant whispered. Rafael thought for a few seconds, then grinning happily he pushed the sheets down and padded across the floor in his bare feet. He looked down at Grant and saw his friend smiling. Grant lifted away the sheet that covered him and he moved back to make room for Rafael. They slept in narrow twin-size beds on foam mattresses, but the beds were big enough to accommodate two nine-year-old boys with room to spare. The two boys lay side by side uncertain as to what happened next. The creaking bed in the adjoining room was making even more noise, there was an urgency to the sound as it started to bang louder and louder against the wall. Then the regular pattern was disturbed, becoming erratic. Then the noise stopped. Silence at last. Rafael breathed out. It felt nice lying in Grant's warmth, feeling the boy's hot dry body brushing lightly against his own. Rafael thought that the warmth seemed to emanate out of Grant and was sucked up by his body. He sighed again wanting to push back towards Grant, until their bodies touched. He trembled slightly, then licked his lips as he breathed heavily. Grant smirked, "They're finished," he said. Rafael nodded. "You wanna do that?" Grant added. "Uh,...I,... I guess. What were they doing?" Rafael asked, "It sure was noisy, though." Grant shrugged uncertainly, then slowly extended his hand and touched Rafael's soft cheek. Rafael trembled again, resisting his body's urge to do the same thing back to Grant. He was frightened but he was also excited in a way he'd only been one time before and that was a deeply repressed memory of a time that he wanted to forget. "Raf,... you wanna take off your 'jamas? I will,... if you will," Grant whispered, his fingers still stroking the other boy's cheek. Rafael nodded silently, not understanding why he felt so guilty. Then he felt afraid as a sudden memory came back to him. A memory of a woman shrieking at him, slapping his face so hard that he was thrown onto the bed. The words came rushing back into his mind. What he had done was dirty, it was evil, it was the devil's work. Rafael was dirty, he was evil, he was the devil's spawn. Rafael was a whore, he was a filthy little bastard. Rafael remembered that he had wanted to die. He began to cry silently, shamefully as he felt the disgust building up inside him. Little wet tears began trickling down his cheeks. "Why are you crying?" Grant asked gently as his fingers felt the wetness on the other boy's cheeks. "You don't have to if you don't want." His hand slipped around behind Rafael's small dark head, stroking the silky curls at the nape of his neck. "Don't cry,... you don't have to,..." the older boy whispered. Rafael sniffled loudly, "I do. I want to okay." He reached downward and his fingers clumsily untied the cord of his pajamas. He stopped to let Grant catch up. Grant grinned at him in the darkness. "You ready," Grant giggled, "I am,... on the count of three, okay? One... Two,... Three,..." Both boys responded at once, pulling their pajamas pants down and kicking them off in the bottom of the bed before straightening up. Their excitement had charged them like positive and negative. Their bare legs had touched in the process of undressing and in that brief moment each boy had felt the delicious warmth of the other's bare flesh. 'Electricity' sprang between them and made their hearts pound. They still had their underpants on but the shock of just being in the same bed with another boy without their pajama pants on was more than enough. Rafael breathed heavily. His body quivered and suddenly, strangely, he felt very hot. Grant's fingers brushed against Rafael's warm thigh and he returned the caress instantly. The other boy's fingers lingered, stroking up and down his thigh, coming ever nearer to the special place between his slender legs. The fingers moved to the bottom of his belly getting nearer and nearer to his 'pee-pee'. That seemed to the be the source of it all, of all the heat that flooded Rafael's body. It was the source of the mystery that the young boy sensed all around him. It was also the thing that interested him most about Grant or any of the other boys in the home. That special place grew even hotter every time Grant's fingers came closer. It seemed to ache but it was an ache that didn't hurt. The ache came back time and time again after what he'd done with the man in the bedroom. Rafael caressed the other boy's body, unable to resist the challenge of bringing his gently circling fingers every closer to the other boy's warmth and the little rounded lump in his underpants. He gasped suddenly as Grant's fingers brushed lightly against his own tiny bulge. With all his might, Rafael willed the hand to stay there and not pull away. It was only a momentary touch and the feelings and desire that surged up inside Rafael, the hope that Grant would continue to touch him there, was instantly dashed. He breathed out, knowing that the only way that Grant would touch him there again would be if he touched Grant in the same place. The woman's words haunted the little boy. His dreams had been shattered that afternoon in the man's bedroom, all that he had hoped for, a family of his own, had disappeared forever that day. Tears began to form in his eyes as he reached downward. For only an instant his small fingers stroked Grant's small, very hot bulge. Rafael shivered as his fingers brushed over the cotton and he realized that the cotton was tight and the bulge was much larger than his own. It felt unyielding, not soft underneath, but hard and hot. "Hmmmmm,....", Grant sighed, "Yeah I like that. Do it some more. I'll do yours too, okay?" Rafael, the filthy little bastard in him, the whore in him nodded. His little fingers stroked against the part of Grant's body that seemed the hottest and hardest. It was, he realized with a sudden shock, the other boy's 'pee-pee'. It worried him. The more he thought about it, the more it worried him. "Grant,... there's something wrong with your pee-pee," he whispered, "If feels real hard." Grant giggled, "It's supposed to be like that. Your's is like that too," he whispered, then taking his hand away, he took Rafael's hand away and pressed it down between Rafael's legs. "See, your's is the same." The memory came rushing back, the man's hand stroking his pee- pee until it was hard, painfully hard, then sucking it and kissing it, then licking it again and again as though it was a little lollipop. Rafael shuddered as he remembered how he had enjoyed those feelings. They had felt so good that he had finally relented and touched the man's big penis. It had been hard too, hard like Grant's pee-pee was, hard like his own. "It's not a pee-pee anyway," Grant giggled, "That's what little kids call it. It's really called a dick or a cock and when it gets hard like this it's called a hard-on." Grant giggled again, putting Rafael's hand back on his groin then beginning to fondle the other boy's genitals gently, "See, we both got hard-ons," he observed. Rafael giggled, "It feels nice down there doesn't it?" "Uh huh. Your dick is really stiff Raf," Grant said. "So's yours. Boy it's hot too." "Raf,..." Grant whispered, then paused nervously, "You wanna take off your underpants too?" "I will, if you will," Rafael answered. "You can take mine off if you want and I'll do yours." "Okay,...On three, okay? One. Two. Three," Grant whispered. It was easier said than done. The boys got tangled up. They were both so excited that they couldn't stop. They tugged and giggled as they tried to pull the other boy's underpants off. It turned into a wrestle and the boys twisted and struggled with each other as their underpants got lower and lower. But the physical contact only served to excite them more and within a minute they were touching each other's bare genitals, not caring that their underpants were somewhere in the vicinity of their knees. Grant's warm soft hand enclosed Rafael's short hard cock and his fingers scooped up the little delicate ball-sac as he gently squeezed the other boy's tiny balls. Rafael shivered and pressed his groin forward into the enclosing warmth of Grant's hand. Rafael began stroking his friend's penis with long tickling strokes, fascinated as Grant cooed quietly. As Rafael's awareness of the delightful feelings that began in his testicles heightened he began to feel incredibly light-headed. His own fingers slipped downward to caress the other boy's scrotum. Silently he marvelled at the silky softness of the skin and the two firm little eggs that moved so easily before his fingers. "It feels fantastic, doesn't it," Rafael whispered. "I love it." "Uh huh, your dick is so hard. It's different to mine though," Grant said. "Huh? How?" Rafael asked. "'Cause yours is different. It has this funny skin on the top,... this,..." Grant giggled, tickling the puckered ending of Rafael's little foreskin. Rafael felt the other boy and he was suddenly surprised when he didn't feel that on Grant's penis. "Yeah! It is different. You don't have it there,... I wonder why. You have the same head there just like I do. Push your hand down, no,... you gotta squeeze your hand and push." Grant did as he was told, pushing downward of the other boy's penis, retracting the foreskin so that it bunched around the little bell-shaped head. "Yeah! There. See it's just like yours underneath." "Yeah! It feels different now. The skin is sort of looser. Does it feel nice when I rub it?" Grant asked. "Yeah!.... That's wild. Yeah do that some more. Just like that. I'll do it to yours too." Rafael whimpered as the other boy's hand began to slide up and down his little penis. He reciprocated, working his hand on his best friend's cock, feeling Grant quiver as the delight surged, expanding outward from his rigid cock. Minutes passed, both boys rubbing gently, slowly, then faster as they learned the rhythm of their bodies. They satisfied a need that they both had as they shared their loneliness. In the process the two boys discovered their capacity for endless pleasure. "That feels so good," Grant gasped as he relaxed after the boys had rubbed each other furiously for a few minutes without a break. "I felt like I was going to explode, it felt so good" "So did I," Rafael admitted, now carefully fondling the other boy's tightened scrotum, "It's all tight now and kinda wrinkled up. It was loose when we started. Your dick is even harder I think." "It kinda hurts. Does yours?" Grant asked. "It doesn't hurt exactly,... not like I want to stop or anything. It feels sort of sore, like. And it kinda tingles when you rub on it. I felt like I was going to poop before. Is that how you felt?" Rafael whispered. "Yeah! But I knew I wasn't going to,... but that's kinda how it felt down there." Rafael yawned sleepily, his head only inches away from his friend's as they shared the same pillow. "I guess I better get back in my bed." "You don't have to,... not if you don't want to. There's plenty of room and I can shift over a bit if you want." "Na,... I like it when our skin touches." Grant grinned in the darkness, "You keep giving me goose pimples. You want to sleep here? With me?" "Yeah!" Rafael whispered. The boys slowly released each other's penises, as they began to relax, the heat of the moment passing quickly. They felt warm and close and strangely satisfied. There was no embarrassment, no guilt, no shame, just a wonderful happiness that came from feeling good and sharing their feelings. "Raf,....?" Grant whispered sleepily. "Yeah? What is it?" Rafael asked, yawning then sighing contentedly. "Raf,... Did you feel funny? Down there. When I was doing it fast like that?" Grant asked. "Uh huh! Kind of funny, it tickled sorta but like it wanted to hurt as well. My dick felt like it wanted to burst. I wanted you to keep on doing it and never stop." Rafael yawned again, wanting to cuddle closer to Grant, to feel their bodies pressed together. "I felt like that too,... like you could do it all night if you wanted." Rafael giggled, "I'm too sleepy to do that. It's nice sleeping in the same bed." Grant sighed, "Yeah I know. I don't feel so lonely anymore with you here." He paused a long while, "Raf?.... We could take off our tops too if you wanted?" Rafael grinned and turned onto his back, quickly sitting up and pulling his tee-shirt up over his chest, past his head and then pulling his arms through the sleeves. Grant removed his tee-shirt at the same time. They grinned at each other in the darkness. Rafael's body was so dark that it seemed nearly black while Grant's paler body seemed much lighter in contrast. The boys tossed their tee-shirts onto the floor and lay back, side by side, now totally naked. For a few seconds the boys were afraid to move. While each boy felt the warmth of the other just inches away, he afraid to communicate that he wanted to hold the other boy's body tightly against his own. Although just about every boy in Baker House was sexually active, it was taboo. For a boy to be acknowledged as 'gay' was the 'kiss of death' among his friends. So boys had sex together and then pretended that it was simply fun. Their sex play was not romantic or the result of affectionate attachment or anything else that could be construed as 'gay'. What brought boys together was 'fun'. Liaisons were quick, mechanical eruptions that ended with orgasm. Boys did not sleep together afterwards by choice. They did not express any emotion or feeling other than that necessary to their immediate satisfaction. "Raf?..." Grant asked hesitantly. The smaller boy nodded wearily. "You want to hug? No one's gonna know, if we don't tell them." Rafael shrugged. Even in Davis House boys were ostracized for being too close. In Baker House, where the boys were older and many of them sexually mature, a close friendship that involved a boy in intimate physical contact was despised. But despite his fear and the shame that would occur if anyone found out, Rafael wanted only to oblige his new friend. He nodded, "Promise not to tell?" he whispered guiltily. Grant smiled, "Yeah I promise,... now you," he demanded urgently. Rafael grinned, "Yeah! I promise," he whispered. His heart surged. He had never touched another human being with affection, other than his mother, and even then he was given cursory attention. He needed to be hugged. The desire burst out of him as it came to Grant, scarred by the memory of the accident where his family died in the car and he walked away with barely a scratch. Their young bodies came together as one. Their firm slender bodies united, their legs entwined and arms locked around each other's bare chests. Their soft smooth bellies compressed and their small hot genitals squeezed firmly together. They lay together for a long while, reluctant to break the bonds of their flesh. Each boy was afraid to speak and to interrupt the wonder of the moment. "You feel nice," Rafael whispered, "You feel so hot down there." "You feel nice too," Grant whispered, "I think our dicks are hard again." He felt between their hips, slipping his small hand downward, touching first his own penis and then Rafael's. "Yep,... we both are.... This sure is nice,... being like this....." Rafael nodded sleepily closing his eyes. His erection faded in the next few minutes as he dozed off. So did his best friend. ++++ The boys awoke early the next morning to the noises of birds and insects outside the building and the sounds of boys talking in the bedrooms elsewhere in the building. Grant was already awake as Rafael finally struggled awake, wiping his sleepy eyes with his fingers, yawning and stretching. Then all of a sudden Rafael realized that he was next to Grant and not in his own bed and he pulled back in shock. Then he remembered what had happened the night before. Grant grinned at him, "Hi sleepy head." "Hi Grant," Rafael yawned again. "Did you forget what happened last night?" Grant teased. Rafael blushed slightly and then smiled back, "Kinda." Gently his fingers slipped over the other boy's bare shoulder, then suddenly realized that he was also naked. "We took our clothes off?" he asked, then he slowly grinned, "Yeah, we did, didn't we? What if Mr. Edwards catches us?" Grant shrugged nonchalantly, "He won't be here for a long while yet," he said as he consulted his watch. Grant was only one of two boys that had watches in Baker House. "Can I see your pee-pee? I mean your dick. It felt a lot different to mine,... well it did last night at least," Rafael asked curiously, then added, "I've never seen one like yours close up before". Although he could never tell Grant, the idea that their penises were different was fascinating to him. He had seen other boy's penises in the shower and most were like Grant though a few were shaped like his. Grant grinned at his friend then pulled the sheet downward from their chests, all the way to their knees. He looked at the naked brown boy lying on the bed next to him. "I wish I had a tan like yours," he said. Rafael giggled, "I'm not that dark. I'm just a bit darker than you," he returned, " Anyway, it mostly isn't a tan, my skin's like that. See even my dick is kinda brown too." "Your balls are brown as well, but mine are bigger, see." Grant observed. "I think my dick's bigger by a little bit, it's fatter than yours and even longer and you've got that extra skin too." Rafael grinned, not bothered by the difference in their sizes, strangely happy that Grant's penis was bigger than his."I like the end of yours more than mine," he observed, as he compared his penis to that of the boy lying beside him. "It's nicer the way it has the little thing on top too." Grant grinned looking downwards. "Your's looks kinda funny,...How do you pee?" Rafael grinned back at his friend, "Just like you dummy. I just point and shoot." The two boys giggled. "But,... well doesn't it get wet inside the skin. It looks like it would?" Grant asked. Rafael giggled, "It gets sorta dirty underneath sometimes. If I don't pull it back and wash under it then it gets this icky smell and it itches like crazy." Grant grinned as he stroked the other boy's small penis with his fingers. Unlike older boys, nine-year- old boys usually didn't wake up with erections. That would come in time. As he stroked his friend's penis it slowly began to awaken, shrugging off its stupor and beginning to stiffen. Grant looked on in fascination as Rafael's penis got longer and slightly thicker. The silky brown skin grew tighter and tighter and the little rounded head was still covered in its entirety even when the little boy was fully erect. Grant caressed the smooth length, the ridge behind the glans covered by the boy's foreskin. "It makes your dick look like a torpedo," he grinned. Rafael laughed, "It's a pain to clean, 'cause it's pretty tight. I can only pull it pack when it's hard like this. You know the doctor who does clinic. Well he told me how to keep it clean underneath. I get my dick hard in the shower and pull it down. I have to wash it down there every day, well I'm supposed to anyway, but I don't do it that often. When I'm older, like twelve or thirteen, the doctor said I might even need to have it fixed up. I guess it will look like yours then, that is if it doesn't get looser by then like it's s'posed to." "Well I like your dick like this," Grant grinned, then added, "Can I pull him back like I did last night?" Rafael nodded and the other boy held his hard little penis tightly, then pushed downward to force the glans through the little puckered tip. "It is kinda tight," Grant observed. "What's it there for anyway?" Rafael shrugged. "The doctor said that the tip of my penis was more sensitive because of it, but other than that it didn't really do anything. That's why they do it to boys after they're born, because it's easier to take care of." Grant looked at the little uncircumcised penis between his fingers, the foreskin now pushed back and wrinkled slightly as it gathered behind the tiny purplish glans. The tip was a lot darker than his own which was a pale blue or pink color depending whether it was hard or soft. The skin of Rafael's penis was suddenly much more stretchy and kind of elastic and his hand could slide easily, up and down, without actually moving on the skin. "It looks more like mine now. It looks just like a little acorn on top doesn't it?" Grant observed. "Does it feel any different for you? You know what we were doing last night. If it's more sensitive then it would feel better wouldn't it?" Rafael shrugged, "It tickles,... but it feels cool. I guess it feels like yours does," he added, reaching out and gently stroking his friend's penis, already half erect of its own volition. The two boys remained like that for nearly an hour, separating only to get out of bed, pull on their pajamas and go down the hall to get a shower before breakfast. Time and time again during the day Rafael's thoughts returned to what he had shared with Grant the night before. The morning had been very different, sweet gentle touching as the boys continued to discover how to pleasure each other. In a way it was harmless fun. It was nothing more than a way of making the other boy feel nice. It was done without any expectation of reward because neither boy had the remotest idea about the capacity of a young male's body for orgasm. ++++++ For the next two nights the boys refined their enjoyment of each other's penises and found in their partnership the happiness and companionship that both young boys desperately needed. On the third night the boys didn't even bother putting on their pajamas. Instead they waited until 'lights out' before they undressed and then got into Grant's bed with only their underpants on. On the fourth night they didn't even bother with the pretence of wearing underpants to bed. The two boys stripped their clothes off hurriedly in the dark. They stood facing each other for long seconds as each boy realized the powerful attraction between them. Then they hugged, only the hug was no longer a hug, it had become an embrace that was driven by their burgeoning sexuality. That night was another important step in the boys' discoveries. Rafael got into bed first and pulled Grant with him. By accident the bigger boy lay down on top of Rafael instead of beside him. The excitement each boy felt was unbounded. A weird and wonderful thrill surged through Rafael as he felt the other boy's body over his. The weight, while not heavy, pressed him down into the bed. His arms locked around Grant's back, holding him there above him. The boys lay still for what seemed a long while. While they were frightened by the very intensity of their feelings, the closeness of their bodies and the strange and unfamiliar pleasure made it seem as though it was natural. It was as if they had been brought together for just that moment. Finally Rafael pushed his friend upward. Grant lifted himself away quickly, holding himself up with his arms, his legs still entwined with Rafael's legs. "I'm squashing you aren't I?" he whispered. Rafael shook his head, "It's okay, it feels nice. I like it with our dicks together like this. It feels yummy down there." Grant grinned, "Uh huh. It feels good. I can even feel your dick next to mine. It's kinda pushing in my tummy. Boy your dick sure is hot. It's real hard too." "Uh,... Grant,.... you know,... if you moved around a bit and sorta rubbed them together,... well I bet that would feel great," Rafael suggested. Grant giggled as he lowered himself down onto the slender brown boy. He used his arms and thighs and began to move his hips up and down and rotate them in a circular motion. It was a crude imitation of older boys, but the feelings were wonderful for both boys. As the minutes passed Grant's motions gradually became less awkward and more fluid, finally settling into a natural 'humping' rhythm. As Rafael lay under Grant, his small hands were on the other boy's hips both to guide his motion and hold him tightly. He realized that he was happier than he had ever been in his entire life. He did not wonder why he felt the way he did, though he was frightened by it and he worried what would happen if anybody found them. Only a few weeks earlier, just before he was to leave for Baker House, he had joined in the teasing and taunting of a redheaded boy about his own age when it was 'decided' that Nicky was 'queer'. Rafael felt ashamed of what he had done, remembering that the only thing that Nicky had done was to cry. He'd cried, that was all, and the other boys had made his life miserable. As far as Rafael knew, Nicky hadn't done anything with another boy, certainly not like this. "Hmmmm,..." Rafael sighed, wriggling his hips under Grant's body so that their penises were massaged together. "Hmmmm,.... this feels better than using our hands, doesn't it." "Yeah! You want me to do it faster, Raf?" Grant said urgently. "Yeah!" Rafael breathed out as he began to pull on Grant's hips faster. His penis was throbbing, so hard and stiff that it seemed to hurt as much as when Grant rubbed it, maybe even more. He liked the warmth of the other boy's body and the pressure that squeezed him down. He liked the boy's hot breath against his cheek and Grant's hair brushing his forehead. After a while, he discovered that if he lifted up with his legs and pushed hard with his thighs, his dick was raised up higher so that it was prominently exposed. Then the feelings seemed to get even nicer. It took all of his strength to lift both his body and Grant's body up, but it felt so good that he had to do it. Grant moved faster and faster, jerking erratically as his motions became confused. The two little rigid penises moved side by side, the delicate skin rubbed furiously as the boys moved together. Their thrusting quickly became frenzied until they were breathless and they dropped back onto the bed gasping. Their desires were still strong but their young bodies were exhausted. Both boys breathed heavily, panting for each breath. Slowly Grant rolled off the smaller boy and lay on his side, his fingers sliding across Rafael's soft warm belly and down to his still rigid penis. He stroked it gently, then enclosed the two-and-a-half inch shaft between his fingers, pulling down to retract the foreskin. Curiously he began to stroke the tiny swollen glans of the other boy's penis, wondering how much nicer it felt compared to his own. His own penis felt good of course, but somehow he knew that Rafael's would feel even better. He pressed the tip of his finger against the minute slit, then down into the groove that lay under the head. He rubbed gently. Rafael twitched and then pulled back. "That tickles, when you do that,..." he giggled, "Do it some more," he instructed a second later. Grant was quick to oblige, stroking the sensitive glans with just two fingers and his thumb, rolling the 'bulb' between them. "Hmmmm,... that's feels so yummy. It's better than just rubbing it. I feel like I have to go pee," Rafael sighed, his eyes half-closed in growing delight. "Don't you dare pee in my bed," Grant giggled, "Or on my hand either," he added. "I won't. It just feels like that,... like I will. It's not like when you rub it fast and it feels like its gonna burst." Rafael sighed. Grant grinned, wishing that Rafael would do the same thing to him though perfectly content for the present. He squeezed a little harder and found that while the small rounded head was still hard, it was slowly getting softer. His fingers slipped down and enclosed the small shaft, beginning to rub again so as to make it stiff. Rafael shook his head, "Keep doin' it on the tip, okay?" he gasped. Grant nodded and took the little glans between his thumb and fingers. He began to squeeze and roll it faster and faster. "Ohhhhh,.... yeah,.... do that,...." Rafael gasped, "Yeah!... Faster.... Jesus,.... Grant it's wild.... Do it faster!" Rafael groaned. The boy's buttocks clenched tightly and his body arched, lifting his hips up off the bed, then he shuddered as a sudden and unexpected spasm hit him and he jerked away. Rafael rolled onto his side and pulled his knees up into his chest so that he into a little protected ball. He trembled for nearly half a minute. Grant was frightened and deeply worried by Rafael's gasping sobs, very afraid that he'd somehow hurt the other boy. Then slowly Rafael began to relax, straightening back out on the bed as his shaking passed. "You okay?" Grant whispered. "I,... I didn't mean to hurt you.... I,... I'm sorry Raf,... I didn't mean to." Rafael smiled shyly. "Didn't hurt, you dummy. It was wild. It was like,... well like,... it's kinda hard to explain. It felt like something broke inside me." Grant grinned, "You peed on me," he whispered, "It dribbled outta your dick. Only a little bit, though," he added. Rafael looked at his best friend, "Sorry 'bout that, Grant." Grant smirked, "It felt like you weren't gonna stop at first. I was afraid you'd wet my bed." Rafael yawned and stretched sleepily. "You want me to do yours now?" "Yep!" Grant smirked playfully. Rafael sat up slowly as Grant turned onto his back. He leaned forward and took the fat little penis between his fingers and began to rub up and down gently, quickly making the other's boy's penis harder and stiffer. In the dark he could barely see it but he could feel it and Rafael was very aware of his closeness to Grant, aware of the trust that they now shared, an integral part of their friendship. After a few minutes of caressing the rigid shaft he began to concentrate on the tip, rubbing it the same way that Grant had done to his. The boy sighed then wriggled uncomfortably as the feeling changed, moving instantly from the comforting stimulation of his penis to a tingling thrill that seemed to begin in his bowel and stretch all the way to the tip. Within seconds Grant was wriggling his hips and trying to pull away before pushing back for more the same way that Rafael had. The smaller boy grinned cheekily, persisting in his torment, squeezing and rubbing as fast as he could. He tickled the other boy's glans until he writhed and his small face became contorted in ecstasy as waves of pleasure flooded over him. Unlike Rafael, Grant only came close to the peak, humping his hips upward, then dropping back down as Rafael rubbed until the little glans was reddened and sore just like his own had been. Try as Rafael could, he could not produce the same orgasmic spasm for Grant. However, both young boys had fun trying. Finally Grant pulled away, covering his little limp penis protectively with his hand. "It kinda hurts now," he whispered. Rafael nodded, "Mine did hurt too. You want me to stop?" Grant nodded, "Yeah, I guess so. But you weren't wrong,... I felt like I wanted to pee too. I didn't though, not like you did. Maybe your's is more sensitive on top, because of that thing you have." Rafael shrugged, settling down beside his friend. He sighed, "Boy am I tired.... We sure messed around a lot tonight." Grant grinned in the darkness, snuggling closer to the other boy's naked body, now much cooler than his own, though just as soft and very nice to touch. "Uh,... Rafael? Can I ask you a question?" "Uh huh," Rafael said quietly as he looked up at the dark ceiling. Inside he was confused. He didn't understand why boys would make fun of him if they knew, but he knew that they could never find out. He liked Grant more than anyone he had ever known, even more because of what they did at night together and he didn't understand why. "Raf,... did you feel funny when I was lying on top of you before?" Grant asked. "Funny? How do you mean?" Rafael asked. "Well, its kind of hard to explain... Its like well,... I don't know, just that,... well for a while I tried to pretend you were a girl," Grant giggled, "then I decided I liked it better that you were really a boy." Rafael swallowed, wondering how Grant had read the thoughts inside his head. He shook his head awkwardly, "That's dumb. Let's go to sleep, huh? 'night Grant," he said as he turned onto his side, his back now towards his friend. He lay awake for nearly an hour before sleep finally brought the confusion inside him to a welcome end. ++++++ Through the months that followed; the hot, halcyon days of summer, the endless scorching days when the grass turned brown and everything withered and hung limp, the two young boys maintained their friendship, growing stronger and closer every night. For Rafael and Grant the nights were peaceful times, times of play and discovery as they repeated the lessons of previous nights. Within a week Grant had experienced the first convulsions of what would, years later, become an orgasm. Within a few days after that, the convulsions that accompanied the peak of their sexual activities had become standard. Doing 'it' was something that the two boys enjoyed most of all, usually taking turns to drive each other 'wild', but learning quickly that having a handkerchief close by was important when Rafael was the recipient of Grant's expert ministrations on his tiny dark glans. Every night, from 'lights out' to the morning 'wake up' call, the boys were naked and in the same bed. Usually they slept in Grant's, though on some nights they alternated with Rafael's bed. They shared a familiarity with each other's bodies and gradually came to understand some of the feelings and desires they shared at night. The nightly ritual became a habit, not a bad habit that a boy should be ashamed about, but something that they repeated again and again in secret. Then again in the mornings as soon as they awoke, they greeted the rising sun with an embrace as if they were reborn and renewed their friendship with gentle but intimate caresses that quickly became more erotic as they awoke. However, the two boys were careful during the day to be apart, sometimes even acting as though they didn't like each other. They were so careful in fact, that no one even guessed at the intimacy they shared late at night. The real nature of their friendship was a carefully concealed secret known only to the two boys. The day that the other boys found out about Grant and Rafael was a day that neither boy would forget. It was the day that the hurricane came through South Florida, just forty five miles south of Centerville Plantation. The boys had been 'relocated' two days earlier, travelling northward on four school buses to a school a few miles outside Jacksonville. They slept in the gymnasium on exercise mats, a half a dozen boys to each one. It was crowded and hot as they waited for the storm to pass. All eighty nine boys wanted only to get back 'home' to their own beds and the privacy of their own rooms. For Rafael and Grant the deprivation was even more intense. They looked at each other across the table at lunch with a longing that was barely concealed. The loneliness had returned, growing into a sadness that consumed each of them. They needed to feel the warmth of the other's naked body, to give and receive caresses and to fall asleep locked in each other's arms. They were afraid to even speak to each other because they were afraid that they would blurt out the truth and be ridiculed by all of the other boys. That day it was Grant's turn to clear the table and Rafael went out into the playground with eighty other boys. He wandered aimlessly around the school yard, kicking his feet in the dry dust and making little clouds that hung motionless in the still heavy air. The dust seemed to cling to his legs, his sneakers slowly turning brown the more he kicked. He was bored and lonely and he wondered where Grant was. He had no interest in playing with the others, not now, not ever. That day was hot and sticky and Rafael lifted up his arms and pulled his tee-shirt off. He felt a little better immediately. At least the cotton wasn't clinging to his sweat-moistened body. He ambled back through the trees looking for Grant. Perhaps they could sit somewhere and talk even if nothing else. Rafael's body was noticeably darker now than it had been at the start of summer. He had a rich golden brown tan broken only by the paler skin of his loins. Grant was the same way, but his middle was nearly white. Rafael was not nearly as dark as some of the black or Cuban kids, but he was a lot darker than Grant and the four other white boys that lived in his dorm. He glanced downward and looked at his slender young body, noticing his little nipples. They were smaller than a dime, the spot in the middle flattened. Sometimes when Grant tickled him they became pointed and when his friend rubbed them he liked it almost as much as the feelings that radiated outward from his little penis. His belly was taut and firm, his lithe muscles rippling and giving form to his body. A tiny navel, indented and much smaller than Grant's, centered his body. Below, the boy could see the small bulge in his shorts, the place where Grant touched him and made him feel wonderful and alive. He tried to imagine Grant's hands touching him and rubbing gently on the tip of his cock. Instinctively his buttocks tightened and he shivered as he tried hard to remember the sensations that surged through his body and made his spine quiver with excitement. He looked up, his reverie disturbed, suddenly aware that four other boys were walking towards him and closing fast. "Hi guys" he murmured. The boys smiled at him. The oldest boy called Cal, a black boy who had spent his entire life at Centerville, grinned, "Hi, whatcha doin' Raffy?" Rafael shrugged. "That's not my name, Cal. I don't like you calling me that." Cal smirked, "Listen to him,... I don't like you callin' me that," he imitated in a high falsetto voice. "So whatcha doin', boy?" he asked. Rafael shrugged, "Nothin',... just waiting for Grant. He's doing 'clean-up'." The boys laughed. Cal smirked, "He was, but he got done early. He's gonna be havin' hisself some fun real soon, boy." "Huh?" Rafael said, feeling confused. "You know what a circle jerk is?" one of the other boys asked. Rafael shook his head, pretending ignorance. A boy didn't live in Centerville for very long and not learn the basics. "You wanna find out?" Cal asked, taking control again. Rafael shrugged awkwardly. He knew circle jerks were about sex, something like what he did with Grant. But circle jerks were okay, all the boys did them sooner or later and it didn't matter. It didn't mean a boy was 'gay', it was just for fun. If that was where Grant was, well he wanted to be there too. Rafael nodded. Cal smiled shrewdly and looked at the other three boys standing next to him. "He's kinda young ain't he? I bet he cain't even git it stiff," he teased. Rafael blushed, "Yeah! I can!" he retorted angrily. The boys laughed, "Okay he's in," one boy said. "Okay, let's go do it," Cal smirked, "You can come too Raffy, that is if you ain't too scared. I bet you got the smallest dick in Centerville." The boys continued past Rafael. He watched them leave angrily, despising them but also wanting to go with them. It was the thought that Grant may be there that convinced him to follow and he quickly pulled on his tee-shirt and hurried to catch up. The boys went back into the cafeteria, going into the kitchen to find Grant and two other boys still there. Grant looked at Rafael with surprise. "Where we gonna do it?" someone asked. The oldest boy, a twelve-year-old black boy called Denny, grinned, "Here man, ain't no one gonna see us doin' it." "You're joking,... here in the kitchen?" one boy asked. "Chicken are ya'," Denny grinned. He turned to Cal, "Hey Cal, show us that big fat dick you got, man. Show these boys what a real man looks like." Cal grinned, his hand sliding down, pulling his zipper open. He pulled the fly wide open and faced towards the other boys. Slowly he pulled his underpants down under his full dark ball-sac andextracted his thick, hardening cock so that it protruded rudely out of the front of his shorts. "Wow, Cal's got a whopper," one of the younger boys giggled. "Man, he's huge," Grant said admiringly. Rafael's face suddenly burned with shame, his attention riveted to the nearly hard black cock. It seemed to pulse with the boy's life, stretching the skin until it was shiny and taut. His own small penis had been limp and shrivelled but it began to grow instantly. Cal's penis frightened him, not only because it was so large, but because it threatened him, because of the effect that it had on both Grant and himself. It was several times bigger than his own penis, at least five or six inches long, Rafael thought. He glanced away, realizing that Denny and a white boy already had their shorts and underpants down at their knees. Denny's cock was almost as big as Cal's and he was jerking it, his eyes half-closed as he concentrated. The white boy's penis was a lot smaller, but it was still bigger than Rafael's. Rafael glanced back at Cal. H was unfastening the metal button on his shorts. Rafael watched as the shorts slithered down the boy's dark legs almost to the floor. It was big, like a man's penis, the boy's testicles already flush and full with the onset of puberty. The shaft of his penis was wrinkled with veins underneath, bulging so much that it looked painful. He even had hair there. Like Rafael, Cal was uncircumcised too, but the foreskin was a lot looser and it flipped back and forth over the cherry-sized head as he masturbated. As Rafael looked away he realized that all of the boys were either rubbing their penises or in the process of dropping their shorts and underpants. He looked at Grant, recognizing the small body, the body that had been next to him so many times. Grant was imitating Denny, his eyes half closed, moving his hand back and forth as he gripped his penis between his thumb and three fingers, his little finger sticking outward. Rafael felt strange watching him share his body with the other boys, open to their inspection as he revealed everything. Then he realized that he was the only boy who was not doing 'it'. "You gonna do it Raffy?" Cal taunted, "Come on show us ya' tiny dick." Rafael shrugged and fumbled nervously with his zipper and belt. As his shorts opened at the front he pushed them downward. His little penis was already stiff and sticking out and up in the soft cotton of his underpants, forming a little tent as the cloth was pulled over the tip. He glanced as his best friend nervously but Grant looked away guiltily. Slowly he pushed his underpants down until his genitals were exposed. The other boys didn't seem to notice although they all looked at him. Already all seven of them were masturbating, small hands jerking even smaller cocks, bigger hands on much larger cocks, and everything in between. Grant was rubbing quickly, Cal grunting as he jerked furiously, Denny working slowly, deliberately, each boy finding his own pace, using the technique that he'd discovered through long nights alone in bed or with a friend. Rafael pushed down on the shaft of his penis and exposed the small dark glans. For a few moments he squeezed it gently and then began to stroke his hard little penis, using his thumb looped around the top and his fingers underneath so that they pressed into the softness of his urethra. But try as he could, he could not derive the same intense sensations that he felt when he focused his efforts on the tip of it. Slowly his hand moved up and braced against his lower belly. Then his thumb and first two fingers began to massage the tiny glans. Rafael felt wonderful as he imagined Grant next to him, rubbing his penis in the bed. He was oblivious of the noises of the other excited boys around him, their grunts and gasps, and endless groans of boy-ecstasy. Rafael was rudely awaken from his dream as Denny chortled, "Look at Raffy, he's doin' his dick like a little baby." Rafael looked up uncertainly and felt his face blush deep crimson. "I like it,... it's better,... this way," he mumbled. He looked sideways at Grant. Grant turned away ignoring him, working his own small cock savagely, making shallow grunting sounds as he pumped his thighs back and forth. Then Rafael looked back at Denny, but the older boy had already lost interest, consumed by more enticing games. "Shit! I'm gonna 'cum' any second," Denny gasped, his hand moving faster than Rafael would ever have believed possible. "Yeah,... here it comes,.... ohhhh yeah!" Rafael looked on, captivated by the sight of the boy's orgasm. The dark body strained forward like a bow, his thick hard cock like an arrow ready to be released, then he spurted gobs of white stuff outward a foot or more. Each gob made an arc then splattered onto the dark tiled floor of the kitchen. Even from where he stood, Rafael could see the thick cream spurt out as the boy's life force was ejaculated in a white hot explosion. The boy's dying groans filled his ears. Denny dropped back resting against the kitchen table, still gasping and shaking with the last convulsions of his orgasm. Then a memory came back to Rafael as he saw Denny's smile of triumph. He remembered a faceless naked man in a bedroom, kneeling over his own naked body. He remembered white hot spurts emptying onto his belly and chest and splashing onto his bare flesh, then being smeared into him. At first it was slippery and warm, then as the man rubbed it became sticky. The boy shuddered and looked away as he tried to blot out the memory. It returned again and again. Rafael knew what the white stuff was. Rafael looked at Grant and for the first time since lunch his best friend did not look away. There was a curious smile at the corners of his mouth and his hand fluttered rapidly on his rigid penis. Rafael continued to squeeze on the tip of his penis, occasionally rubbing the length of his shaft as he imitated how the 'big' boys did it. It felt nice either way he decided, but by far the best was when he rubbed on the tip. He met Grant's eyes and smiled back. His penis twitched, a precursor to what he knew would follow. The tingling ache in his bowel began to increase. He rubbed harder, trying to increase his pleasure even further. His breathing quickened as his thighs pushed forward, tightening a muscle somewhere inside his abdomen. That muscle lifted his testicles higher and made the pleasure intensify even more. He didn't want to pee in front of the other boys but if he did he really didn't care. Cal moaned loudly and Rafael turned quickly to look at the boy standing next to him. Like Denny only a minute earlier, white milky juice spurted out, less this time though still dramatic and well worth watching. Cal kept rubbing and pumping his fist rapidly on his thick black cock, sending spurts sideways as well as onto the floor in front of him. One spurt landed on Rafael's leg and again the memory of the man's semen on his body came rushing back. The man's hands had been large and very strong. They had massaged the boy's soft flesh until even the stickiness had gone and there was nothing left except the memory. Rafael remembered how some had gone as far as his face, landing on his chin. Most splashed onto his narrow brown chest and waist and pooled into his navel so that it was full, like a little pond of white cream. The last of it had dribbled out of the man's huge cock like milk, spotting the eight- year-old boy's penis and scrotum. Rafael looked down at his right thigh and watched in silent fascination as the bead of thin immature semen trickled downward. It left a wet trail until it reached his knee and was stopped by his shorts. Then another boy, Jeff, just eleven years old, moaned as he came, gasping and spitting milky-white juice. Then he too sagged back against the bench as his desire deflated with his penis. And then Ronnie, barely ten years old, ejaculated, or rather came as close to ejaculation as a ten-year-old boy can, as several tiny milky drips were discharged. The other four boys, between nine and eleven-years-old were still immature. For one boy ejaculation was only a matter of months away but for two, Rafael and Grant, it was a matter of several years. Still they tried hard but to no avail and gradually they tired, losing interest as their penises became sore and reddened and they finally stopped. "You guys wanna do each other?" Denny suggested, no longer interested in watching the other boys masturbate. Within seconds it was agreed and the boys paired off. Cal and Denny each took a mentor role with a boy who had not achieved visible results of manhood, while Ronnie and Jeff formed another partnership. By default Rafael and Grant were left together. The boys split up, each pair moving away slightly as if seeking privacy from the others. Rafael and Grant waddled into the storeroom with their shorts still at their knees. They stood facing each other, each feeling the same desire and the need to satisfy an urge that was deep inside. Slowly Grant reached out and began to stroke Rafael's penis. "I missed him," he whispered. Rafael reached out and enclosed Grant's penis, "Me too,...How did you find out about this? You were doin' it just like them." Grant shrugged, "Denny asked me if I wanted to after lunch, when I was cleaning up. I guess it sounded like fun. I didn't know you would be there too," he added guiltily. Rafael shrugged, beginning to rub his best friend's penis. He was angry and jealous. For some reason he thought that they would only do that 'stuff' together and never with anyone else. He didn't want to share Grant with anyone. "Do it faster," Grant instructed, his breathing beginning to get more strained, pumping his narrow hips harder against Rafael's hand. He was bigger than Rafael and in his growing urgency he pushed the smaller boy backwards until Rafael stopped with his back hard against the wall. "Faster!... Do it faster Raf," he pleaded. His thighs were jerking, pumping his hips, his small pale buttocks clenching with each forward motion. "I can't," Rafael complained, "You're pushing me into the wall. I can barely move my arm as it is." Grant grunted and eased back, then a moment later his hand reached down and grabbed the other boy's tee-shirt lifting it up to his armpits, then pulled up his own tee-shirt so that their bare chests, bellies and thighs were together. Rafael sighed, his slender brown arms locked around Grant's waist and he embracing the his nearly naked body. Their genitals were compressed and both of their little penises were hard and throbbing with happiness. "You feel so good," Grant sighed. "You too,... I missed you so bad last night. I can feel him sticking into my balls," Rafael giggled, stroking Grant's slender back with his fingers. "Faggots," Denny squealed loudly, his voice in the process of breaking. "Guys come look at the faggots. Its Raffy and Grant,... they're doin' it like queers." The two boys sprung apart instantly but it was too late. Four pairs of eyes had seen them and the damage was done. "I ain't doin' no jerk offs with a goddamed faggot," Cal shrieked, "Them's both queer as shit. I always knowed that. I told ya' Raffy was queer didn't I Denny? He even looks like a girl." The two boys got redder and redder, their rigid little cocks sagging with every taunt until they were limp. They dressed in silence, knowing that by dinner time there would not be a single boy in the whole place who didn't know that Rafael and Grant were 'gay'. They went outside sadly and wandered around aimlessly knowing that there was little they could do to stop it. ++++++ They endured the endless teasing and name-calling over the next two days, the occasional whistles as they passed the older boys, the stares from younger boys. They ignored them and tried to keep apart. They tried not to show that the words hurt, though the words cut deeply into them. The worst insults came from the boys they lived with in Baker House. These boys were of their own age but they were boys who were most threatened by their own well- concealed feelings and emerging sexual desires. They pushed the two boys away at night, refusing to even sleep on the same exercise mat or to use the same shower. Their hostility was open at dinner as they ignored both of them or made humorless comments about 'queers'. "He's a pervert," Jeff said loudly as smirked and he pointed at Rafael across the table. "I saw him doin' it with Grant, they's both queers." Rafael shook his head and looked down at his plate. His dinner was barely touched, mashed potatoes and peas puddled, the grey- greasy minced steak abandoned. Jeff hadn't seen anything. "I,... I'm not. I'm not a pervert! You didn't see anything!" Jeff smirked, "Yeah I did. I seen you, suckin' on Grant's dick and beggin' for more." "You're a liar," Rafael said angrily. "Who you callin' a liar, pervert." Jeff laughed, making an O shape with his lips. "More Grant. Give me more," he chortled. "I didn't do that. That's a lie and you know it," Rafael said, scrambling back from his bench where he sat by himself, his fists clenching angrily. "Suck me Raffy. Ohhhh suck me hard," Jeff continued. Rafael leaped at the other boy, sending his plate skidding across the table and crashing to the floor. His fist hit something soft, then the eleven-year-old boy's fist slammed into his face and sent him flying back the way he'd come. He toppled over the bench and crashed to the floor. "Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!" boys began to chant. Rafael staggered up, the entire left side of his face burning painfully, blood pouring from his nose. He looked around. "It's a lie," he screamed, "You're a liar Jeff." Jeff came around from the other side of the table. "Hit the little faggot," someone shouted. "Punch his face in. Little shit-pusher." Rafael's fists clenched tighter waiting for the attack. He was scared. Jeff was a lot bigger than he was, at least thirty or forty pounds heavier and five inches taller. Jeff charged, his fist swinging. It connected with Rafael's shoulder as he tried to get out of the way and knocked him sideways. The chanting was loud, filling the cafeteria with shouts of "Fight!" Rafael ducked the next one and moved nimbly to one side as he punched as hard as he could into Jeff's belly. The boy grunted in surprise. "Way to go Raf," someone shouted. "I'm gonna fuckin' kill you shit-pusher," Jeff swore as he came back towards Rafael. "That's what you think," a loud voice said right behind him. Jeff swivelled around and saw Mr. Edwards. Rafael saw his chance and he slammed into Jeff, kicking and punching as hard as he could, screaming out, "It's a lie! It's a lie! He's a liar!" Strong arms grabbed the boy around his narrow waist and levered him away. Rafael struggled, kicking back and striking painful blows in the shins of the person that held him. Slowly his struggles ended and he sank back, crying out his pain and hatred. "You can let him go thanks Jerry," Mr. Edwards said, releasing his hold on Jeff. "Fight's over boys! Finish you dinner and clean up this mess," he called out loudly. The room fell silent. "You two, come with me." He led the way outside and then turned. The two boys stood before him. Rafael sobbed as blood trickled down his cheek and splattered on the vinyl floor.His eye was already swelling up. He smeared his face with his hand and wiped the blood back towards his ear. He was still trembling, his breathing coming in quick sharp gasps. "So?" Mr. Edwards asked. "He started it, Mr. Edwards," Jeff got in first. The man looked at the smaller boy and smiled. "Sure Jeff. Look at him. Poor little bugger is more than two years younger than you." "He threw the first punch, sir. He did." Rafael nodded and sniffed loudly as the blood continued to dribble down onto his clothes. "I did.... I,... I couldn't help it. He said things." "What did he say?" Mr. Edwards asked. Rafael looked at him silently. "Jeff?" The two boys were silent. "Okay? Rafael clean yourself up. Then get back here and clean the mess up. And no more fighting. Do you understand? Both of you?" The boys nodded and Rafael went off to the toilet. The cold water helped as he bathed his face. It soothed the bruised flesh and helped to stop the bleeding though by the time the bleeding stopped his tee-shirt was smeared and splattered with red spots. He went back into the cafeteria to clean up the mess after the other boys had finished dinner and gone back to the gymnasium. Outside it was raining, the aftermath of the hurricane as it travelled across the Gulf of Mexico and into Louisiana. The fight was a turning point and slowly the two boys' friends began to support them. By the time they left Jacksonville for the return trip to Centerville the worst was over and other than Cal and Denny, everyone else seemed to have forgotten. ++++++ Chapter 1. Continued ++++++ In the months that followed, the relationship between Rafael and Grant changed. Their feelings for each other, while still very strong, had been tempered by their exposure as 'gays'. It had hurt both boys though they almost never talked about it. Neither of the boys understood the desires that seemed to build up inside them again and again. There was a mysterious thrill that each boy enjoyed when the other boy's naked body was against his. They became even more secretive, waiting until late at night before Rafael padded across the floor and slipped into his best friend's arms. The two boys still hugged and fondled each other at night as they lay together but they did it in fear. The spontaneity and the passion that they had experienced had gone. Now they were ashamed to find solace in the each other's arms. They seldom went all the way to orgasm and tending only to play gently with each other's penises, rubbing their bodies together less and less frequently. It helped relieve their loneliness but it fell short of satisfying the needs of two young boys. Only a few days before Christmas, 1992, friends of Grant's parents visited Centerville and arranged to take the nine-year-old boy away for the holidays. He left with them the next day and Rafael cried himself to sleep on Christmas Eve. He sensed what was about to occur and he dreaded it. He had seen the signs, the smile on the woman's face, the way she touched his best friend and talked to him. He knew the caring gestures would quickly become loving affection. Grant would soon be adopted. Rafael knew it with absolute certainty. Christmas was cold and lonely. His solitary present consisted of a baseball glove, a present from the State of Florida, a magnanimous gesture of the institution. Hell, he didn't even like baseball. For most of the day the boy sat in his bedroom, trying hard to read a book, struggling over nearly every word until he finally gave up in frustration. He had seen the movie, 'Treasure Island' when it had been played on the TV downstairs. He wanted to read the book, he wanted to read it more than anything. Finally, he kicked it across the room and put his head in his pillow and cried. The loneliness was unbearable. He heard the noise of other boys as they came back upstairs, then the scramble as they got undressed and into bed before 'lights out'. Rafael pulled off his jeans and socks and lay in the darkness on top of his bed, his eyes red from crying, hating his life, hating Centerville, hating everyone there, hating Grant. After a while he felt the growing pressure in his bladder. He needed to go to the bathroom before he went to sleep. Still dressed in his sweat-shirt and underpants, he made his way down the corridor to the bathroom. He pulled the elastic waistband of his underpants down and poked his little penis over the top, pointing it at the stainless steel bowl. He squeezed his sphincter, then as his bladder relaxed, directed a thin stream of clear piss in the bowl. He wobbled it around and around in circles making sure that none splashed on him. Finished, he squeezed out the last drips and turned around as he pushed his little penis back inside his underpants. He gasped in shock. Jerry was standing back against the wall looking at him strangely. Rafael trembled involuntarily as he felt a shiver run up his spine. Jerry smiled and looked at him closely. "Hi Raffy," he said. "You're s'posed to be in bed you know." "I had to pee," the boy said nervously. Jerry was seventeen. He was one of the oldest boys at Centerville, at least in the dorms. When boys turned thirteen they were moved out of Baker House and into Anderson House until they turned sixteen. At that time boys either dropped out of high school and went to work on the plantation or became 'big brothers' and went back to help 'supervise' the younger boys. Jerry was a supervisor. Next year he'd probably be going to college because he had a scholarship. He looked at Rafael suspiciously, "So take a piss and get back to bed, kid," he said. "I already did," Rafael smiled. He liked Jerry ever since his fight with Jeff in the cafeteria. Jerry smiled again and raised his eyebrows. "You bin crying or what?" he asked Rafael looked away towards the door. He wanted to go back to his bedroom and cry again. He wanted Grant. Anyone. He pressed his lips together resolutely and shook his head. "You lonely?" Jerry asked. Again Rafael shook his head. Jerry shrugged. "I get lonely here sometimes. This is a lonely place to grow up." He sighed. "It's hard to make friends here. You know what I mean?" Rafael looked at the older boy and returned his stare. Suddenly he realized that Jerry's eyes had dropped down and he was looking at his legs, at the little rounded bulge between his legs. Rafael swallowed nervously but a thrill surged through his body and he shivered again, and then he understood what Jerry wanted. He shook his head. "I,... I don't do that stuff, man," he said. Jerry looked up. "If you don't want to be friends, well I can't help you." "Help me how?" Rafael asked. "I know how to take care of my friends just like your friend Grant does." Rafael looked back at the older boy arrogantly. "What's that supposed to mean?" Jerry shrugged. The two boys faced each other. Rafael thought about running out of the bathroom but he didn't move. His body seemed frozen and unresponsive to the message that the boy wanted his brain to send. But his brain was sending a message, a message that overwhelmed Rafael when he realized. "You're gettin' a hard-on just thinking about it aren't you," Jerry smirked. "I'm not," Rafael retorted, begging silently for the gradual stiffening in his underpants to disappear. "Hell you're not," Jerry grinned. "You know some of the guys take stuff to make themselves feel good?" "Yeah! I know that. Everyone knows that," Rafael said, trying to control the panic that swamped his mind. It seemed like his heart was beating faster and he knew what that meant. "I got stuff,... in my room,...you'll feel great after you have some." "I,... I don't want to, okay?" Rafael said. He was shivering as he felt his bare legs getting cold. "Up to you, kid. Just thought I'd make the offer." Jerry moved to one side as if to let Rafael get past. The young boy stepped forward then stopped. "We're not s'posed to have that stuff here. It's not allowed in the dorm." Jerry shrugged, "Not wrong kid. You gonna tell?" Rafael shook his head. "It'll make you feel good. You won't even think about your friend, you'll feel so good. It feels really nice, nothing matters anymore." Rafael stepped forward and tried to squeeze past between the older boy and the wall. Jerry reached forward, pressing the boy against the wall with one hand. The other hand moved downwards and three fingers settled over Rafael's small, now-very-hard penis. Two fingers were on either side of the bulge in his underpants while the middle finger stroked up and down the length of the underside, and pressed into the softness of the boy's urethra. "You got a real nice hard-on, haven't you?" Jerry smiled looking into the boy's dark eyes, "Not that big, but it sure is a stiff one," he added. Rafael struggled but with his back to the wall and held firmly by Jerry's hands there was nowhere to go. All he succeeded in doing was wriggling. Jerry's fingers moved up his penis and squeezed on the tiny glans. The boy shivered, still trying to pull away. "It feels real nice," Jerry breathed out. "Every boy likes to feel nice, and not only down here. I got some stuff that'll make you feel nice everywhere, kid." Rafael shook his head but he was more excited than he'd been for months. It overwhelmed him even as he was shaking his head and trying to say no. He stopped trying to escape, no longer shaking his head. He sensed that Jerry knew he was giving in. He seemed to sink down; there was nothing left for him, not without Grant, nothing at all. A little tear formed at the corner of his right eye, getting bigger until it finally broke free and trickled down his cheek Jerry smiled, "No point in crying. It doesn't make you feel any better inside. It's okay to cry if you want. Come with me. I promise you'll feel so good you won't want to cry ever again." Rafael made one last attempt to shake his head but he couldn't. Jerry eased his hand away from the boy's shoulder while keeping the other between the boy's legs as he gently massaged the little tip of his penis. Rafael whimpered, a little puppy-dog whimper. It was a cry of anguish from deep inside him reduced to a plea for help and submittal. Jerry turned and went out of the bathroom. Rafael paused then he was drawn irresistibly after him, almost running to keep up as Jerry strode down the hall and into his bedroom. As soon as Rafael came through the door Jerry closed it behind him. He checked quickly to make sure that they had not been observed. The dormitory was silent. He turned to Rafael and silently admired the young half naked boy. He was a beautiful little boy with perfectly formed features and a smooth brown body. His slender legs stretched gazelle-like from under the sweat-shirt that hung past his buttocks and groin. It covered the boy's underpants and he looked as if he wasn't wearing any. The navy-blue sweat-shirt was old and stained but it looked perfect on Rafael. It was an expression of his youth and innocence and it was two sizes too big for the boy. Rafael was small for his age and the sweat- shirt would have fit a boy of twelve or thirteen. It hung loosely on the slender little body, accentuating his slenderness and making him look like a little waif. The neck had been stretched over the years and it barely hung on the boy's shoulders. It revealed the smooth brown skin of his shoulders almost to where the boy's arms were. It served only to increase Jerry's arousal and make the older boy's penis stiffen appreciably. It tightened into his jeans and bulged outward noticeably. Jerry reached out and brushed the boy's neck with his fingers. He slowly moved them to one side to stroke the warm soft skin of Rafael's shoulders right up to the neck of his sweat-shirt. Rafael trembled uncomfortably as he remembered when he had never wanted to be with anyone else except Grant. That time seemed so far away. He was alone now, and soon, too soon, Grant would be gone. He wanted to be hugged. He wanted to cuddle up to Grant's warm body and fall asleep like the two boys had done at first, before Denny had found them and spread the story that both he and Grant were 'gay'. He knew that Jerry wouldn't hurt him. The older boy's eyes were gentle and his voice was soothing. Jerry always helped the younger boys by defending them against the older boys whenever possible. A nine-year-old boy had little chance against a boy four years older. "I really like boys with nice hard dicks," Jerry mused as his hand settled back over Rafael's groin. The stiffness had not faded and the younger boy did not pull away like before. Rafael smiled shyly and breathed deeply and relaxed sa he absorbed the gentle caresses that he desperately needed. Slowly Jerry guided him backward, the only pressure being his hand cupping the boy's small sex organs. His fingers curled and lightly tickled into the boy's little ball-sac. There was only a single bed in the room, a twin- size like Rafael slept in with Grant, and the young boy moved back until he felt the mattress against the back of his legs. Rafael stopped. He was breathing heavily and no longer cared what happened to him. "You want some stuff, kid?" Jerry asked quietly. "I don't have any money," Raphael whispered. Jerry smiled. "With your looks kid, you don't need any. Think of it as a Christmas present." "I've never done this before. I know kids who do. Some boys here do drugs and stuff. I think Cal does and Denny too but I haven't before." Jerry smiled again and took his hand away from Rafael's swollen genitals. He walked over to the dresser. He felt in the back of the top drawer until he found it and then took out a little tupperware box. Rafael looked on. He was captivated by the older boy and drawn to him in a way that he had never known before. "What is it?" Rafael asked nervously. Jerry smiled. "Is it pot?" he added. Jerry grinned. "Pot's waste of time. A lot of boys do it, but it's nothing at all. This is what a boy needs." Rafael smiled shyly. He had enjoyed the touch of Jerry's hand on his swollen penis. His touch was different to the way Grant touched him. When Jerry touched him it wasn't gentle like Grant, it was harder and rougher. Jerry didn't hurt him but it let Rafael feel the strength of his hand. Jerry came over to the boy and cupped his small very-exited genitals.Rafael breathed deeper again and pressed forward into the older boy's fingers. He squirmed slightly as the fingers squeezed his balls. For a moment Rafael wanted to back away, then he checked himself. It still didn't hurt although it felt a lot different than before. Within seconds he wanted it even more and he wriggled his hips. The older boy's hand obliged and tightened. Rafael winced as the pleasure turned to pain, then faded. The youngster had never realized that his testicles harbored such incredible feelings, but Jerry was fully aware of it. Again Rafael came back for more and again Jerry obliged, never squeezing enough to really hurt the boy though always just enough to show who was in control. "It kinda hurts when you squeeze real hard," Rafael whispered urgently. Jerry nodded, "Yeah, but you like it don't you. You like it when I hurt you just a little bit down there, don't you?" He squeezed and Rafael nodded, breathing harder and faster. His little sex organs ached with a mixture of delight and a strange sensation that bordered on being painful, but wasn't. "Yeah,... I guess... Yeah I like it but it sorta hurts." Jerry smiled and eased the pressure in his hand and the boy breathed out in relief. "Your nuts are still really tiny. When they get bigger you'll love this. But I like you just the way you are now.... You wanna try some of this?" he said flipping the plastic lid off the container. "Its acid,... LSD,... You'll like it. You probably better start with just one hit at a time. No point in blowing your brains right out is there." Rafael looked at the older boy uncertainly as he watched him unfold the remains of a blotter. "What do I have to do?" he asked cautiously. "I know you aren't giving it to me for Christmas." Jerry shrugged. "What do you want to do?" Rafael looked at him silently, wondering what he wanted. "You want to take your sweat- shirt off maybe?" "You want me to strip off?" Rafael asked. "It's more fun in the raw," Jerry grinned, "You feel it more somehow." Rafael nodded, "You gonna play with my dick?" he asked awkwardly. "That's what you want me to do isn't it?" Jerry smiled. "Well it is, isn't it? There's no need to get uptight about it. I know you like it, most boys your age do. I bet you have a really nice dick too. Really small isn't it?" Jerry smiled reassuringly at the young boy. "Don't worry. None of the other boys will find out. Not even your friend Grant." "You won't hurt me will you?" Rafael asked. "Now why would I want to hurt you for. I promise you'll like it more than anything you've ever done. Even more than what you do with your friend at night." Jerry's voice was quiet and strangely reassuring. Rafael blushed, "How do you know what Grant and I do at night?" he blurted out. Jerry smirked, "I've heard you, messing around and that stuff after 'lights out'. Hell you two aren't the only ones, but you guys sure do it a lot for a coupla nine-year-olds." Rafael blushed even further and his ears reddened as he realized that Jerry had probably stood outside his door and listened. "You like being the girl, don't you?" Jerry smirked. "Some boys are like that." "Huh?" Rafael mumbled in shock as he knew what Jerry had heard. "Come on kid, I've heard you, talking like a girl while he humps you." "But,... well we only did that a few times," Rafael said nervously. Jerry shrugged, "Hell I don't care. What ever turns you on. You'd make a pretty girl if you were one, but you're great the way you are.... as a boy." He pulled a small square off the blotter and passed it to Rafael. "What do I do with it?" the boy asked quietly. Jerry smiled. "Just chew it up and swallow,... easy huh?" He watched as the boy put it into his mouth, watched the small jaws moving, then swallow. Rafael breathed out. "Now what happens is up to you, kid. If you want some more you just take your clothes off. Everything okay,... and Uncle Jerry will take care of you." Rafael swallowed and licked his lips. His penis was still hard. It seemed to have been stiff for hours and it ached to be touched. "What if someone comes in?" he whispered no longer able to contain his growing excitement. "They won't!" Jerry tore another corner off the blotter and held it between his fingers. The temptation was too much for Rafael. The temptation was not the drug; it barely entered his mind. Slowly Rafael raised his arms above his head as he tugged the well-worn sweat-shirt upward, then discarded it on the floor. He stood nearly naked before the older boy. "Everything," Jerry teased, holding the paper in front of Rafael. The little boy obediently skinned his underpants downward, pulling them down his thighs to his knees, then wriggling his slender legs so that the warm cotton cloth slithered to the floor. He stood straight up and tried to increase his height as the older boy looked him over as he inspecting Rafael's now-very-naked body. The boy's little penis stood at attention too, as straight and ramrod-stiff as it's proud young owner. "Nice dick," Jerry said, his voice trembling with excitement. "Yeah real nice dick. I was sure you weren't cut." "Huh? What do you mean by cut?" Rafael asked. "You still got your foreskin. They cut most boys. I haven't got one." "Neither has Grant," Rafael said. "You going to take off your clothes too?" he asked. Jerry shook his head, "Not yet. Maybe later on". He passed the piece of blotter to Rafael and watched the younger boy as he chewed and swallowed again. "Your dick is real small... That's the best kind,... real small and cute." Rafael giggled, for the first time his small penis wasn't a handicap. It made him feel strange but it was good to feel proud about his body. "I'm only nine, well nearly ten, in a few months. It'll get bigger as I get older won't it?" "Sure, every guy's dick starts off small. Your's will get bigger in a few years but it's never gonna be huge,... say like Cal's whopper. But what do you want a Cadillac or a Porsche?" Rafael giggled, "A Porsche! Cadillacs are shit!" He glanced sideways at the bed. "I don't feel different yet." Jerry laughed, "It takes a while. It's your first right? you outta start getting wild in about an hour." "A whole hour," Rafael whined. Jerry shrugged, "Takes a while to get into your system. If you shoot up it comes real fast, but that's for dummies. Anyway it's a mile better that pot,... even the real hot stuff." He looked down at the naked boy standing less that two feet away. "Besides it's going to take that long for me to take care of my little friend down there. You want another hit?" "Huh? Yeah I guess." Jerry tore of another tab from the blotter. "What are you gonna do for this one?" he teased Rafael giggled and moved back towards the bed as Jerry placed his hands on the boy's shoulders. He eased the boy down onto the sheets and passed the small square of paper to him as he turned back to his dresser. He came back with a jar of Vaseline. Rafael looked on curiously as the older boy opened it and scooped out some on his finger. "What's that stiff for?" he asked. "For you dick, kid. I don't want you getting all sore on me. Little kid's dicks are real delicate. If you rub 'em too much they really hurt. This stuff'll make it nice and slippery." Rafael grinned and stretched back on the bed. He watched as Jerry smeared the yellowish grease over his penis and scrotum until it was glistening and oily. It felt a lot nicer than when Grant did it with just his hand, though it had never hurt that much when the two boys did 'it' together. Then Jerry sat down on the bed with his back against the wall and positioned the young boy's body so that he lay back with his head on the pillow and his buttocks in the older boy's lap. Rafael's slender brown legs were stretched wide apart. Jerry began pinching the tip of the boy's penis, squeezing it, rubbing it and teasing it until Rafael trembled uncontrollably. The foreskin still covered the glans and after a few minutes Jerry pulled it back and began to massage the little-acorn-shaped head. Rafael's response to this was immediate. He dug his heels into the bed-covers, clenched his eyes shut and gasped frantically. After a few more minutes Jerry shifted his attention to the little ball-sac and massaged the tiny eggs until the boy writhed and whimpered. Jerry increased the pressure and the speed, jerking upward on the delicate slippery skin and pulling the boy's balls between his fingers so that they were compressed tightly. Rafael's hand was in his mouth. He bit into the soft flesh of his palm as he tried to stop from screaming out. The young boy's penis subsided, no longer able to maintain his erection in the face of torment. The feelings were no longer concentrated in the few all-too-short inches of his penis but came from somewhere deep inside him. They charging up and down his spine until he quaked and his legs flopped around on the bed uselessly. Then Jerry shifted his attention back to the boy's penis and rubbed on the oily little shaft until it hardened and lengthened again, then went back up to the tiny dark glans again. He grinned as he watched the little boy orgasm. He felt the small buttocks twitching and tightening against his legs and then the boy's thighs strained and lifted upward as the slender back arched. He loved to see the sheer exhilaration in the boy's face as he came to the peak and then the shuddering convulsion as he crashed. Rafael was still gasping for more and Jerry kept on rubbing the boy's penis. He transferred his attention back to the boy's balls and then with his other hand went to work on the glans at the same time. Within a minute Rafael spasmed again, jerking uncontrollably as his body lost control. But now, unlike his first times with Grant, there was no loss from his bladder. He had long discovered that if he peed right before he did 'it', it was dry, just like Grant's was, and there was no wet puddle in the bed that he had to sleep in. Jerry slowed down and allowed the boy recover. He caressed the still swollen penis lightly, running his fingertips up and down the reddened shaft and stroking the smooth hairless skin of the boy's pubis. His hand slipped downwards and fondled the little wrinkled lump of the boy's ball-sac, tracing the flesh backward and downward into his crevice. Jerry smiled as he felt the moist warmth inside the boy's most private place. His fingers probed further, feeling for the tiny puckered entry of Rafael's anus. Already the acid was taking effect and the boy sighed, not caring that Jerry's finger was squeezing into him. "You like that?" Jerry teased. "Yeahhhh!" Rafael hissed. "You had it in you yet?" "Huh? Had what in me?" "You had a cock in here yet?" Jerry said. The boy looked surprised and Jerry smiled. "You're still a virgin? With your looks? Jesus, that's wild! You mean you haven't been screwed yet by Denny or Cal or any of those other little fudge-packers." Rafael looked at the older boy uncertainly, questioningly. "Huh?" Jerry smirked. "Well that is how guys do it you know! I think it's gross and dirty,... but that's how they do it. I don't believe you haven't done it yet. Not even with Grant?" Rafael shook his head in disbelief. "A guy can put his dick in there?" he asked in disdain. He wrinkled his little nose distastefully as he swallowed. Jerry grinned. "Hell yeah! You'll get laid by one of those black kids sooner or later. Cal's okay. He's pretty big for you, but you get used to it pretty fast. Then you can't get it enough." "Yuck! I'd rather just do this stuff," Rafael admitted. Jerry smiled, "So would I, 'specially with a beautiful little dick like yours." He started to rub Rafael's penis again, stroking the sensitive flesh to make it even stiffer. It swelled until tiny blue veins bulged outward in the almost translucent silky skin. Rafael had two more orgasms before the acid took over and he began to shiver, then burn as heat roared through his naked body. Already exhausted, he fell into a half-sleep state, with vivid dreams often flashing before his eyes as his mind wandered. They were powerful, intense nightmares that he could not be certain were real. The lights above him spun crazily, then he was in a tiled room, slipping and sliding on a film of oil, then vibrating until his head throbbed. It went on and on endlessly, the patterns blurring until he could no longer distinguish reality, chewing on the little bits of paper that Jerry passed him. Then later, much later that night, he floated free into space. Lightening arced around him and he looked down and saw his penis bigger than he'd ever imagined it could get. It was huge and it throbbed and he held it in both of his hands, making a tube for it, and he pumped. Then he lay back and he pumped the big cock against his belly. It was so hot that it burned into his stomach. Without warning it flooded him and a thick white-hot liquid spurted up his chest. He mumbled incoherently, wanting only more and more. He wnated the dreams to go on forever, to take him away from Centerville. After nearly five hours he fell asleep. He awoke in his own bed, naked and cold and unsure of how he had gotten there. It took all of his strength to get dressed. That morning he was sick at breakfast and Mr. Edwards brought him back upstairs and told him to get back into the bed. He wasn't able to go to the movies to see 'Home Alone Two', one of the few special treats that the boys of Centerville would get that year. His head throbbed for most of the day and he lay in the silence of the empty dorm, wishing that he had never been born. There was an ache in his testicles that would not go away though he barely remembered how it got there at first. Slowly, as the day passed and turned into evening Rafael remembered everything, well almost everything, that he had done with Jerry. He remembered with startling clarity lying underneath the older, bigger boy. Both of them were naked and Jerry's huge swollen cock was pushing hard into his belly. Jerry was humping against him and forcing his body into the mattress. He remembered Jerry groaning and moving faster, the weight crushing him, then the shuddering, quaking motion as he orgasmed and the other boy's semen spurted between their bodies. It had shot outwards, all the way up to his chest, running in the groove between his breasts until it reached his neck. He didn't remember how long he had laid under Jerry but it seemed like a long time because when Jerry moved away his front was nearly dry and just slightly sticky. There was a faint memory of being carried back to his room but he was too drained to remember anything more than the dim lights in the corridor as they passed overhead. Two days later Grant came back. Rafael never told Grant what happened and for the next few days there was a cold, unfriendly distance between the two boys. Guilt blossomed in Rafael, guilt that came not only because he had betrayed Grant but because he had enjoyed what Jerry had done. Rafael had enjoyed it more than anything he'd done with his best friend. His genitals had been sore afterwards and the glans of the little boy's penis had stayed 'puffed up' for most of the next day. It was sensitive to touch as well, but deep inside Rafael knew that he would want to do 'it' again like that just as soon as the opportunity presented itself. The opportunity came the next weekend as Grant's 'admirers' picked him up on Friday afternoon for a weekend trip to DisneyWorld. Rafael was green with envy but he pretended to be happy for Grant, going down with him to the parking area to say good-bye. He wandered off and stood under the trees as their car drove up. The signs that Grant's days at Centerville were numbered became increasingly obvious as he watched the man shake his best friend's hand and the woman give him an affectionate kiss on the cheek. Rafael went back to his bedroom and cried. Just after midnight Rafael crept down the corridor and into Jerry's bedroom. He stayed until early in the morning. Only an hour before sunrise Jerry guided the naked, still-drugged boy back to his own bedroom. The next night Jerry came to Rafael's bedroom. The liaisons continued over the next month or so. Every weekend that Grant disappeared with his 'family', Rafael visited Jerry. He rediscovered the delicious playful feelings he had known with Grant and replayed the rougher painful experiences of Christmas night. As he shared his body with the older boy he never understood what drove him to return time and time again. However, during those times Rafael never progressed past what he had done the first time. Acid was a part of his ritual, though he had never took more than two of the little pieces of blotter again. Although he liked the sensations of freedom that came, the euphoria of abandoning his own life and discovering a surreal existence where his loneliness vanished, it was the warmth and closeness that he enjoyed the most. On Wednesday, just two days before Rafael's tenth birthday Grant told him that he was going to be adopted. He was leaving Centerville on Friday. That night Rafael slept by himself and sobbed quietly, while Grant lay in his own bed and stared guiltily at the dark ceiling. However, Grant was happy because he was finally leaving. Rafael ignored Grant for the following two days, even making sure that he was away when Grant departed. He could not say good-bye to the only friend that he had ever known. He went down behind the barn with Jerry after school and let the older boy do 'it' while he lay back in the long grass, bright green with the fresh shoots of Spring growth. He hated himself, wished that he was going with Grant, wanted to say good-bye and hug his best friend just one more time, but it was too late. Without the slippery film of Vaseline his penis was soon rubbed raw but at least some of his pain was taken away. When he finally came back to his room Grant's things were gone. There was no sign of the boy, just a lonely empty room. Even the smell of the other boy seemed to have gone. There was, on his bed, a small present wrapped in colored paper. Rafael fell down on his bed and cried until he fell asleep some hours later. He didn't open the package until several days had passed. There was a card on the outside, a note from Grant that said: To Raf, I will always be your best friend, will write as soon as I can. This looks like you! Happy Birthday! Grant. Inside Rafael found a tee-shirt, grey in color with a picture of Mickey Mouse on it, not one of the usual pictures, but one with the 'Mouse' leaning back against a wall, an arrogant, pouting expression on his face, a cigarette in his white-gloved hand, a can of Bud at his feet. Rafael smiled and put the tee-shirt in his dresser. He would always treasure it. Coming Soon: Chapter 2. Initiation: Rafael and Calvin