It was wonderful. It was a mistake. For four years in college I was her friend and confidant,
Whenever she was dumped upon by each of a string of losers I would be there to provide a shoulder
to cry upon. We both came from wildly disfunctional families and that was our bond, I guess. I did
care for her but being a retard nerd I never made a move on her. One week before graduation, my
graduation, as I was helping her pass an astronomy course, she suggested that we nap as we were both
tired. I woke up at dawn with my trousers oper and Barb stroking my penis. She was wearing only
panties. I asked her what she was doing and she flopped down on top of me and started kissing me. I
felt her wetness against my penis and I was close to coming. I said that I had no rubber and we
couldn't do this. She was needing to go to school for another semester and her getting pregnant would
be a big time problem. She said that she had a diaphram in place all ready and that she wanted me.
That was it. I slid off her panties and entered her. I fell out accidentally as she was bucking to meet
my strokes with vigor of her own. She grabbed my penis and I ejaculated all over her chest. Barb
was most upset but she calmed down when I told her that I was not being noble but clumsy. I told her
that I had never done it before and I wasn't very good at it. She said she was left still up in the air and
needed more. Soon I was hard and my second performance was improved. I enjoyed myself. I felt
warmth and affection for Barb. But I knew full well as she lay in my arms that we would never make
it as a couple. I needed to address my problms and she needed to adress hers. Most of all our
problems would get in the way of any sort of romantic relationship. I had realized that long ago and
that is part of the reason I never made a move on her--the rest of the reason being that I was a
hesitant nerd. 
Barb started talking about marriage and I had to tell her that it was out of the question for us. That
there was a right man out there for her and that I wasn't him. I saw a side of Barb that I had only
surmised but never had seen. She mounted an attack on me that caused be to run from her appartment
with a curtain around me. Barb figured that I was leaving Antioch and her. I was certainly leaving
the college and in all truth she and I would likely drift apart. Now we were parting for sure. Three
month later I returned when she passed the word hat she was pregnant. When I insisted on taking her
to a doctor for prenatal care, (abortion was not an option then), it turned out that she knew that she
was not pregnant. Barb if you read this, know that that I cared for you as a friend and I still do, but
getting married would have been a mistake for both of us. I suppose that I was wronged but I have no
hard feelings; just a sense of regret that a friendship ended in the manner that it did. The sex was
wonderful and that which followed was better still.