Star Trek/The Sexed Generation [1/2](Sexual parody) Aboard the Federation Starship, USS Enterprise, Captain's quarters: "Captain's log, stardate 24169.2," the Captain intones. Jean Luc Picard sits casually at his desk. "The crew has not had shore leave in nearly six months and the strain is beginning to show." His right hand slides idly down. He begins slowly rubbing his crotch. "If the crew doesn't get leave soon, something is going to explode." Pause. "My balls!" Suddenly sitting up straight Picard says, "Computer, belay that last reference." "Do you mean the one to the captain's testicles?" the female voice responds in its crisp, businesslike manner. "Yes--yes. That's the one." Just then there door chimes. "Come," says Picard, sitting up very erect and straightening his tunic, while trying to ignore the erection in his trousers. In walks First Officer, Commander William Riker. "Something I can do for you, Number One?" the captain asks. Riker's face brightens, and his cock strives to come to attention as he stares at the Captain's open mouth. Then he catches himself and covers his crotch with both hands. "Well," Riker swallows, "er...not exactly for me, Sir. I've noticed that Chief O'Brien's wife has been acting strangely lately." "Yes. Cute little Nip, isn't she?" "That's just the trouble, Jean Luc. Every time I pass by her, she grabs a hunk of my ass." "Okay, Will, I'll take care of it. You just leave everything to me." Tapping his communicator, Picard says, "Chief O'Brien to the Captain's quarters." Riker exits. Another chime of the door bell. "Come," says the Captain. In walks O'Brien. "You sent for me, sir?" "Yes. How are you?" asks the Captain casually. "Fine, sir," O'Brien lies. "How is that lovely wife of yours? Are you treating her well?" "Oh yes, sir," O'Brien lies again. "What I mean is--to put it bluntly--are you taking care of her..ah...sexual needs?" "Well...ah...no, Sir," O'Brien says sheepishly, casting his eyes to the floor. "Why not?" Picard raises his voice. "She appears to be a very sexy little...er...desirable young woman." And desire is exactly what the Captain is feeling at this moment. "Well...ah...er...sir," O'Brien stammers. "That's true. It's just that I've...er...lost interest in women, Captain." Picard's eyes light up. "Well," he says in an official sounding voice, "I suggest that you see Commander Riker with your problem. Right now I have a pressing engagement. Er...why don't you send your cute...er...efficient little spouse around to my quarters. Maybe I can...ah...counsel her on the matter." "Sure, Captain. I'll send her right along. You can even fuck her for all I care." Picard's eyes almost pop out of his head at O'Brien's words. He swallows loudly as the chief exits. A short time later there is a chime at the Captain's door. "Come." The door slides open revealing Lieutenant Keiko O'Brien. "You wanted to see me, Captain?" There is something different in Keiko's demeanor. Absent is her usual efficient manner. Instead, her voice is very feminine--almost seductive--and there is a discernable wiggle to her slim hips as she steps through the door. "Ah, yes, Lieutenant." Captain Picard rises from his desk, moves to Keiko's side and puts his arm around her shoulder. "It's come to my attention that..." Picard's voice trails off as he guides the young woman toward his bed. As he does, his arm slips lower and he grabs a healthy helping of her firm buttock. Keiko looks at the Captain and smiles. The pair undress quickly and jump into bed. Keiko throws her legs wide open, baring her hot pussy. Picard's dick is rock hard. He shoves it into Keiko's hot cunt and begins thrusting his hips like a wild animal. Yes...yes...oh, yes." cries Keiko. * * * Meanwhile, Counselor Deanna Troi lies on her bed in a long, flowing see-through nightgown. She is as horny as she is beautiful. "I'm tired of having to use my vibrator every night," she says angrily to herself aloud. Then her eyes light up as if she has just had a bright idea. "I know where there is a big strong man, where I can get some real cock." She jumps up and sweeps out the door. Moments later there is a chime at Commander Riker's door. "Come in." Counselor Troi glides into the room, looking very sexy. She sidles up to Riker. "Will," she says seductively, rubbing her voluptuous body up against him. Her deep breathing expands her already ample boobies even further under his watchful gaze. She begins to undo his tunic. Riker tries to resist, but it is futile. Soon he is down to his skivvies. With a flourish, he whips them off, revealing his manhood. Deanna looks astonished. Then she covers her mouth and begins to laugh. "What's so funny?" says Riker frowning. Troi is nearly doubled-up with uncontrollable laughter. She takes one hand from her mouth and points. "What's that?" she cries, tears of laughter streaming from her eyes. Riker looks down at his pencil-thin, three-inch hardon, unable to comprehend the Counselor's behavior. "Oh, Will," she manages. "I have to go. I just remembered that I have a date with my vibrator." She turns and hurries out the door. * * * Meanwhile, Captain Picard and Keiko are beginning to rock and roll. There is a chime at the door. "Come," says the captain automatically, without thinking. "Captain," cries Keiko in dismay. "We've just started. I'm not ready to come just yet." "Not you. There's someone at the door," says Picard flustered. He rises and attempts to make himself presentable. Doctor Beverly Crusher has entered his quarters and followed his voice to the bedroom. "Oh, I'm sorry, Jean Luc. I didn't know you were engaged." "I'm not engaged. I was a moment ago, but I'm not just now." "Well, it's not important," lies Beverly, her horny pussy almost burning a hole in her pants. "I'll see you later...when you're not so busy." Crusher turns on her heel and departs. Picard looks after her retreating figure, frowning in frustration, but not for long. "Captain," Keiko coos. He turns to see her legs spread wide, her hot, wet pussy glistening invitingly. "Engage," he shouts, and dives in, ramming his horny cock at warp speed into Keiko's equally horny pussy. Moments later they have left the galaxy. * * * Meanwhile, we have left Commander Riker standing with his mouth open and his dinky dick hanging out. There is a chime at his door. "Come in," he says absently lost in the task of trying to fathom Counselor Troi's strange behavior. In walks Chief O'Brien. He stares for a moment at the nude form of First Officer Riker. "What am I going to do?" says Riker. "It happens every time I'm about to score. When a chick gets a look at my dick, she practically falls on the floor laughing, then runs the other way. Is there something wrong with me?" O'Brien suppresses a laugh of his own. "Well, Commander, you are kind of small. But not to worry," he brightens. "I've got enough for both of us." O'Brien proceeds to strip, unleashing a massive boner. "Wow!" says Riker, eyes gleaming. "I just remembered. I don't even like women." He reaches down, grasps O'Brien's huge member and begins to stroke it, a big grin on his face. * * * Picard and Keiko have just finished dressing. "Thank you very much for your help, Captain," she says sweetly. "You're quite welcome, Lieutenant. Anything I can do to assist my crew." Keiko exits and Picard slaps his communicator. "Doctor Crusher, I'm free now if you'd still like to see me." Crusher, who has been lying on her bed and has been frantically and furiously finger-fucking herself, leaps from her bed. "I'll be right there, Jean Luc." Moments later she enters the captain's quarters. "Jean Luc, I see that you are now disengaged." "Ah yes, Beverly. Now what can I do for you?" "The same thing that you did for Lieutenant O'Brien, if you've got anything left, you horny bastard." "Ah, yes. Shall we retire to the bedchamber?" Crusher undresses and leaps onto the bed. She flings her legs up and out. Picard undresses and dives in between her legs, burying his face in her torrid cunt. * * * Meanwhile, Riker is bent over taking O'Brien's giant cock. It is about eight inches long by two inches in diameter. Riker is moaning with pleasure. Finally, O'Brien comes. "Thanks," says Riker as O'Brien's cock slips from his well-used ass. "Oh, don't mention it, Sir. In the years I've been in Starfleet, I've been fucked over so many times by officers. It's a pleasure to finally be able to return the favor." * * * Meanwhile, Data is minding the bridge. "Lieutenant Yar, I have noticed an odd phenomenon aboard the Enterprise lately. The crew members have been spending an inordinate amount of time in their quarters. Do you know of any reason for this unusual behavior?" "Yes, as a matter of fact I do, Data." Yar comes around to stand beside him, swiveling her hips as she does. Yar always swivels her hips when she walks. "Do you want to get it on?" "Get what on, Lieutenant? I am already fully clothed." "Well, we'll take care of that. I mean, do you want to fuck?" "Oh, I see. I am frequently troubled by the human idiom. What you mean to say is, 'Do you want to get your clothes off?'" "Whatever you say," says Yar. "Let's do it." They undress-- Data methodically, Yar feverishly. "Although I have no need of genital organs for the purpose of procreation, my creator designed me to be anatomically correct in every way. I have the exact facsimile of a human phallus with the ability to tumesce at will. I therefore do believe that I have the capacity to satisfy you sexually. I have also been programmed for stimulating foreplay--" Yar, who has been running her hands all over Data's naked body, cuts him off. "Fuck the foreplay. I was born stimulated. Just get your android ass in gear and sock it to me." She grabs him by the ass with both hands and falls back against the railing. Data's technologically advanced dick homes in on her hot pussy of it's own volition and begins churning her insides. Yar thrusts hers ass wildly and moans loudly. The pair at the helm--one male and one female--glance at each other, but say nothing. * * * Ten-forward is empty except for Worf and Guinan. Worf sits nursing his drink, staring morosely into space. Lieutenant Worf, being a Klingon, does everything morosely. "So what say, Worf? Do you want to get it on?" asks Guinan. Worf scowls. "Do you mean would I care to engage in a sexual encounter?" "Whatever. I just wanted to know if you wanted a good fuck." Worf scowls. "Klingon women are extremely aggressive sex partners. I've found that the females of most other species are too delicate by nature to engage in really stimulating sexual activity." Then he eyes Guinan critically. Rising from his seat he says, "Yes, Guinan. I do believe you could be a true test of sexual prowess." Moments later they are both naked. "Now that's what I call a cock," exclaims Guinan eyeing Worf's foot-long tool. "I always wondered if what they said about Kingon men was true." Worf hoists her up on the bar and rams his massive Klingon prick home into Guinan's hot cunt. They begin wailing away. * * * Meanwhile, back on the bridge. "I'm sorry if you were not entirely satisfied," Data is saying. "I thought I performed admirably. It was in accordance with the function for which I have been programmed. Do you think my creator may have made a miscalculation as to the requirements of the female orgasm?" "No, Data. It's not your fault. It's just that you are only average size. I need something bigger." "Ah, then I believe that the reason for your lack of erotic satisfaction is that you have had so many sexual encounters that your genital passage has been stretched beyond its limits." Yar throws him an if-looks-could-kill glance. Data goes on unperturbed. "However, I do believe that I have a solution to your problem. My memory banks describe the ultimate in female sexual satisfaction as an animal known as the Dick-Dick. And there is one aboard the Enterprise at this time. It is the companion of the Cerrulian Ambassador." "Hmm. Maybe she could be persuaded to share her companion." Tasha Yar exits. She is passed by two crewmembers who relieve the pair now on duty. They exit quickly, each with a hand on the other's ass. Data opens his mouth to say something to the retreating Yar, but she has already gone. * * * Meanwhile, the session in ten-forward is fast becoming a test of strength and stamina, of skill and of will. Guinan throws her educated ass this way and that, trying to throw Worf off his game plan, but Worf holds fast like a mighty tick and just keeps feeding her more Klingon dick. He varies the intensity and tempo of his pelvic thrusts, trying to catch his partner in a misstep, but Guinan hangs in there matching him stroke for stroke. They are both grunting and groaning loudly as the contest heats up. "Fuck me, you Klingon son-of-a-bitch...grunt. Make it come out my...grunt...throat." "That I cannot do...grunt...but if you will hold...grunt...still ...grunt...for a moment...I will accommodate you in another area." Finally, Guinan tires. Worf senses her failing energy level. He catches her coming when she should be going, and plunges the full length of his massive rod up to his Klingon balls in Guinan's pussy. She screams like a banshee and her body sprawls limply across the bar, several inches of Worf's Klingon cannon protruding from her ass.