story about masterbation

     It was the summer of my thirteenth year when I first became aware of of
the pleasurable activity that has now become a regular hobby. My sisters and I
had gone to visit my grandmother who lived seven hundred miles away. I never
cared too much for my grandmother and frankly I still don't but I would have
gone just about anywhere to get away from the monotony of home.
     My grandmother always went shopping when we were there, but I rarely
elected to tag along as I usually wound up being bored out of my mind and the
fact that she had cable TV at home was no great motivator to leave the house.
As my grandfather had passed away some years earlier, I was left alone in this
huge house to do as I pleased, and that's exactly what I did.
     As a smaller child my sisters and I, who are one and three years older,
would play naked 'games' when left unattented at home, but as far as I can
recall I never had an erection and I can't say I'd have known what it was if I
had. The things we did were relativly innocent considering some of the stories
I've read about inscest and the fact that my oldest sister was the only one who
had reached peuberty. It didn't go on for very long and we have never really
spoken about it to this day.
     When I say that my grandmother had cable TV, I don't mean sex channels and
the like, but it sure beat the old antenna anyday. One day, early into the our
two week visit, the trio of women had gone to the mall and I was sitting on the
couch watching MTV. It was 1987 and I remeber George Micheals 'I Want Your Sex'
video was on when I felt an itching that I knew I'd had before but had never
scratched, as I proceeded to get an erection from the stimulus. The flashing
images of flesh combined with the word 'sex' repeated over and over we're now
imprinted on my brain associated to the ever growing itch in my fruit of the
looms. I didn't touch it then but I knew I wanted to.
     My family is extremely christian and I felt guilty even watching the video
not to mention wanting to play with my genitals, but as I lay in bed that night
the images and sounds of the media began to flash in my head and naturally my
erection ensued. I had neglected it for thirteen years and I couldn't restrain
myself any longer. I had no idea what was going to happen but I at that point
all I could see or hear was, "sex". I reached into my pajamas and began slowly
rubbing the stiff, soft fleshy head when all of the sudden waves of pleasure
filled my body and mind, for what at the time seemed like an eternity and I was
in pure and utter bliss. Then as quickly as it came, it waned. I was the
happiest I'd ever been in my entire life up to that point and all I can remeber
thinking was, "Wow, how come nobody ever told me I could feel like that!". I'd
had no conception whatsoever that it was even remotely possible to aquire that
kind of sudden, extreme pleasure merely by touching mylself.
     The aftermath of my realization was, in a manner of speaking, alot less
glamorous. I didn't get the guilt right away as I would in the naievity of my
teenage years, but I now had this clear oily liqud on the head of my penis
which puzzled the hell out of me. I knew what it was, but I expected it to be
more like urine, I suppose, as thats the only thing that had ever come out of
that hole before. After having gone to the bathroom and come back I lay in the
bed pondering the whole ordeal, "Will this happen often?", "Am I going to tell
anybody?", "Will I going to hell if I do this alot?". My thoughts ranged from
amazement to bewilderment to guilt over and over. It was, at the time, the most
wonderful and perplexing thing I'd ever known, and I'll never forget that
moment as I imagine no one ever does. The rest of my visit consisted of
conjureing my first fantasies of innuendos as well as watching alot of MTV.
Every time I climaxed, the amazement grew as I learned all about this new found
function of my body.
     Eleven years older and wiser, and I still do it pretty much every day,
some days more than others and somedays not at all, regaurdless of whether I'm
in a relationship or not. All of my guilt as well as my fears of divine
retribution are but memories as I have come to realize, as everyone should,
that it's a completely natural act and as such should be treated with as much
modesty and sense of nescessity as any other bodily function.